[Vogue]

Dear Erin! I know ur pain...I've been there 3 times. It hurts a lot! First I was very sad and couldn't stop crying, then I was so angry at myself, but then I started to heal. My job help me a lot, I was keeping myself busy all the time so I think less about my losses. It takes time but every day you will start to feel better and stronger. First m/c was pretty easy on me because I didn't even know that I was pregnant until I had my period for longer than usual and my doctor did a blood test and it showed I had chemical pregnancy. My second m/c was really hart and emotionally painful since my doc already told us due date which was our wedding anniversary. News about that I'm losing my baby for the 3rd time I received on February 14th...yep, Valentine Day. After my 3rd m/c I said to myself that I will never try to have a baby again because I can't put myself through it again. But the idea of being mom and having a baby is help me to gain the strength to try again. This month I just finished my first cycle on Clomid with IUI and now I'm waiting to have my blood work done on August 4th. Tell you the truth I'm so scared to have BFP because what if...? I'm praying that this time everything will be fine. Anyways I hope you will feel better soon ...take as much time as you need. We are here for you.