[desperate]

Hi Guys,

I am so ready for this hellish journey to be over and to finally start my family. All my friends and siblings and cousins all have children growing up and I feel we are missing it. After many years of failed infertility treatments we are thinking that enough is enough. We are out of pocket and the financial strain is becoming as bad as the emotional and physical strain.

We want to give IVF one last try -- we've decided to get consults at some of the best places in the country, and give it one last shot. But we also know that if we get a BFN at the end of all of it, it will be too much to bear. What we would really like to do is start filling out the paper work and preparing for adoption now. That way, if the BFN comes, we will at least feel happy that we are waiting for our adopted child. And if we do happen to get pregnant, great. Then we will have a bio and an adopted child.

The downsides to this are stress and cost. But the plus sides, as far as we see them, greatly outweigh the negatives. It will cement that this is indeed our last try, and it will also not leave us shattered should IVF not work out. We are ready to open our hearts to an adopted child, but my question is this:

Will the agencies see it our way? Will they allow us to do both at the same time? Does anybody have any experience with doing both at the same time?? I am worried they will deny us entry into the program until we've come to the end of our fertility treatments and have greived for a period of time. Anyone have any insight????

THANKS!