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i am in 2ww after an iui using donor sperm. if you read through my signature you'll see that we have had an extremely hard last couple of years. I think that had a lot to do with my husband being so open to the idea of donor sperm. after loosing our daughter we learned that she had too many chromosomes. She had extra chomosome 12 on her 1st chromosome. We had genetic testing to see if it was something that we carried, and it turned out that my husnand has the balanced translocation. it is a little confusing and i won't go into how it all works, but after years of trying without having a clue as to what was wrong. we felt like we finally had an answer. our dream is to have a family, and there is a whole lot more that makes a family than genetics. If we are lucky enough to have a baby, my husband will that baby's daddy in every way that matters.
We also did photo match to try and match characteristics as well as we could. And yes we plan on telling any resulting children. We plan to keep it simple while they are young, saying that "mommy and daddy needed help to get you", and then when they get older tell them more when the time is right. The only people that know about our situation is parents, and my sisters. Other than that i would like my future children to get to decide who knows and who doesn't.
I am sorry this is so long! hopefully you and your husband will come to an agreement. But i am willing to bet that almost all dad's to donor sperm babies will tell you that they knew that baby was thiers the moment they saw him/her.
i hope this helped some. if you need anything else, please let me know.
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