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I don't know if this is an option, but does your husband have a brother? If you used his brother's sperm, he would at least be related to the baby and it may feel more like his own? Doctors are probably years away from being able to inject donor sperm with your husband's DNA but maybe ask if it is possible? I am sorry and will keep fingers crossed for you.
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Me: 31, PCOS, anovulatory
DH: 35, Low count
married since 7/2003 (living abroad, DH finishing PhD, moving around too much to start family)
ttc since 12/2007
8 months on our own before seeing RE
4 rounds of Clomid/ Ovidrel/ Actos
4 months off due to cysts between Clomid tries
3 rounds of Clomid/Ovidrel/ Actos and IUI
still 
2 fur-babies:  Jungle and Epiphany our 2 cats
African Grey Timneh named Huginn
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