[purplegrasshopp]

My husband and I got pregnant after only three months of trying, but I miscarried at 6 weeks. It was the worst feeling I have ever had. We have been trying to get pregnant again since then (6 months), to no avail. I feel so lonely and depressed, and every time I get my period, I am miserable all over again. If anyone out there has been through the same thing, I would love to hear how you got through it.

[Jackie5]

I'm sorry about what you're going through.

The only thing I can think of right now is to tell yourself iwth each new bleed that it's a new start, a new opportunity, a new baby waiting to come out -

I make an analogy like people who bemoan getting old, another year, another birthday. I tell those people - just be happy you're alive - there are so many people, kids that don't even make it to half your age, you know what I mean?

So with you, just try to find strength and hope in the fact that you got another period - that your body is trying to do it again. I know somebody born without a uterus. I don't know if her ovaries produce eggs or not. But imagine her situation? She doesn't even get a period. So I know it's got to be INCREDIBLY hard for you but try to find hope in each new cycle instead of seeing it as a failure of the last cycle. Good luck and I'll keep my fingers crossed for you .

[purplegrasshopp]

Thank you for this positive outlook. I manage to not think about it all month, and be really positive, but as soon as my period comes I have two days of sadness/madness/depression. Then the positive me comes back. I do try and put it in perspective, but lately, it seems everyone I know is pregnant and had a really easy time doing it!

[eternal]

Purple-
My sympathy for your loss. One of the big problems with IF is that it recurs -- before you process one loss entirely, you have to face another one. It sounds like you're really handling it well, being upbeat 28 days a month and down 2 days a month! My only suggestion -- really give yourself permission to be miserable those 2 days! You need to get it out of your system

[northerngirl]

I have been told since I was 17 years old that it would be very difficult for me to have children. At the time, it seemed so far away as I wasn't considering starting a family. I always knew I would want to. I have PCOS and have always been very irregular.

I'm now in my late twenties and have recently married a wonderful man. He wants a family so badly. We started trying even before our wedding and figured what ever happens happens. I found out that day after our honeymoon that I was pregnant. I was over joyed, but quickly felt as though something bad was going to happen. I prevented myself from being happy about it. I miscarried and was overwhelmed by my feelings. My husband took it very hard, therefore I was trying to be strong for him.

Several months later I find myself becoming more depressed and more obsessed about getting pregnant. I'm not even sure If I've ovulated since? People keep saying "don't worry about it" How can I stop being so preoccupied with it?

[Canna]

Hey, I know exactly what you are going through. Exept it's worse than you described it, but then again, there are no words. I was pregnant shortly after my husband and I were married, but to my dismay I miscarried, I can't think of anything that could be worse... other than losing my husband. When I was three I used to pray that God would turn my doll into a real baby by morning, I really meant it too. If things worked that way I would still be praying for the same prayer, but of coarse I grew up and learned where babies really come from. After the miscarriage, my husband and I decided to go on birth control, and wait to have a baby in a few more years, but I just couldn't wait anymore, and neither could he, so we've been trying for 3 to 4 months but so far nothing. Actually this month my period was late, so I got my hopes up, then TODAY I started and to top it off the cramping is unbearable! Anyway to answer your question of how I get through is just keep praying, and when the Lord is ready to give me a child he will. I know that it won't be the same, but have you considered adoption? Well, I'll go, it was nice "talking" to ya.

[michele-dances]

I got pregnant last fall, and miscarried on new years eve. I thought that I had myself together, but looking back I can say without a doubt that I was depressed for several months.

I'm also pretty sure that it may have been for the best, because since then, I've done research on PCOS, diabetes, etc and feel much better prepared. I have drastically and permanently altered my eating habits, have found a good omega-3 supplement and have now for months been having regular 35 day cycles and ovulating. My blood sugar is now managed (it was NOT when I had been pregnant). January is going to be the first serious attempt to get pregnant. We'd been half trying the last few months while I have been figuring out ovulation days, but I wasn't expecting to get pregnant these last two months. I'm using Fertile-Focus, an ovulation predictor (it was spot on last month).

After those first hard months, my focus on my health is what helped me pull out of my depression. There could still be another miscarraige in my future, but I hope not, and I feel like I've reduced the chances significantly. That gives me hope and optimism.

I hope you find success soon!

[AmyK72]

My husband and I are trying to get pregnant. I miscarried after 8 weeks, so I know how you are feeling. I am sad and worried that it will happen again. It just happened 2 weeks ago so i think i am still in shock. You are not alone.

[pink123]

I am so sorry for all of your losses. I have had three miscarriages and am seeing a specialist to hopefully find some reasons why.

I don't know what to suggest to help yourself heal, for me it helps to talk about it. I am the only one of our friends not currently pregnant or with a new babe. So for them to know what I have experienced helps so they have a better understanding why I may not feel up to going to a baby shower or coming to the hospital to see the new baby.

Surround yourself with supportive people and know that you are not alone.