[Kellileanne]

My best friend from college is giving up on having kids of their own!!!!! She has had two miscarriages and now the clomid she was on is causing really bad cysts. She is about to go on birth control to try to control the cysts but says she is ready to give up. Her hormones are messed up worse than mine and with all the testing they were doing they still don't have any definite answers of what is wrong.
I feel soo sad for her, she wants kids as badly as I do! I don't know what to do. I know she is feeling bad about it all.
I just don't know what I can directly do for her, I want her to feel better and I wanted to have babies at the same time as her and they could grow up like family!!!
This is really upsetting me (I know how bad she wants kids!)!!! I can't believe she is giving up!!!

[Laura0622]

I can certainly understand her feelings of wanting to give up. After my 3rd IUI with clomid, we called it quits for about 3yrs. The clomid started causing problems for me (cysts and they thought possibly implantation probs.). However, we ended up changing our minds after several years and jumped back on the IF bandwagon. Maybe your friend just needs a long break right now. Maybe she will end up changing her mind, too. If she doesn't, well it is her decision to make. She knows what is best for herself. It isn't the end of the world if she decides to live child free or decides to adopt. All you can do is be there to support her in what ever decision she makes. Just have open ears to listen with and provide a shoulder for her to lean on.

[Kellileanne]

Really, thinking of all she has gone through, I can't blame her for giving up--atleast for the time being. Until they can figure out what is really going on and what hormones aren't being produced properly she really should wait to keep away from more miscarriages. I am a little calmer about it right now, had a couple of days to think about it and am understanding as much as I really can (haven't gone the medication route or have the extent of her problems) and will try to be as supportive as possible!