[J-LYN]

SWT357

I can only imagine that 2ww... How are things?

Keeping fingers crossed and wishing you a BFP..

Let us know

Hugs,

Janet

[msa]

Hi J-Lyn and everyone,

Haven't visited in a while. End of school, giving and grading finals, cleaning the classroom, getting it ready for someone else to use.... So glad for summer vacation!

We are using an anonymous SD through Pacific Reproductive Services. We were originally going to ask a very good friend who we know would've said yes, but then he got engaged...so, we nixed that one--too awkward.

It's always good to hear about other SS couples having and/or raising children together. It makes me hopeful...

We're hoping this next round of injections will produce good-looking eggs and that our SD has some super duper swimmers . If this doesn't work, we'll have to sit down with our RE and "discuss next steps," which I know will focus on my age and a review of statistics that just never seem to be in our favor . But we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. We're taking things one injection, one u/s, one iui at a time. Trying to stay philosophical and hopeful--for all of us.

[taka]

hi MSA, How many eggs have you been producing doing and which injectibles? Good Luck to you and your dp

[msa]

Hi! I'd been on 225 iu of Menopur for 5 days; however, when we went for follie sizing on Tuesday, I only had 5 with the largest at 9 and the smallest at 6. So, my NP had me increase the dose to 300. We're going in tomorrow for the update. I'm hoping we can trigger on Sunday for iuis on Monday and Tuesday.

I'm so nervous about this cycle! I just don't want to have to sit in my doctor's office and hear the stats once again. I don't even know if they'll let me continue past 43 (looming in August); it's something that just never came up. I don't know if I was just overly optimistic that I would be one who beat the odds, or if I was just being unrealistic--and is there a difference?

This cycle more than the others I've been really wondering if we waited too long. But when I think about it, we weren't truly ready until last year. Still doesn't make me feel any better, though. I'm trying to stay positive, hoping that this will be THE cycle, THE one (or two ) egg that fertilizes and sticks. And if this ISN'T the one, what next?

Hmmm, I seem to be blabbering...sorry. Thanks for the good vibes, Taka! And how are YOU doing??

[marilynn]

There are going to be some "miracle" 40+ babies out there. I can feel it. for everyone. Just lurking mostly.

[taka]

MSA, I know exactly how you feel. I am going to be 43 next week. We did our first round of IVF in May and are will be doing another at the end of the month. The first re we saw was all about the statistics and very negative-basically told us to go straight to donor eggs. we then met our current re who really looked at our individual case and told us to go for it. Don't beat yourself up about waiting until now. I have done that as well...I always think, oh if I had met my husband when I was younger...things like that. But I didn't and here we are. We have each other we love each other and this is our life....

Marliyn, I so agree! we will have babies

[J-LYN]

HI ladies.. sorry I was MIA for a few days.. went out of town,and just been crazy ever since.

I got AF just as we returned from our trip. So now I'm on estrogen 3x a day, and 4 estrogen patches as well. On this coming Sat. they will thaw our one last embie. It is frrozen at 2pn stage, so its' another waiting game to see if it makes to to blast. Dr said t doesn't look so great, but hey.. miracles happen, right?

I am in the same boat with you girls. I'm gonna b 43 in 6 months... i get frustrated that I did wait to long. I met my hubby 16 years ago... and I should have put my foot down a long time ago, and said this is what I want, with or without you... I was scared. I talked myself out of it a time or two.. thinking we would be a happy older couple and travel.. etc... but the desire to be a mom never went away... until I turned 40 and it starting pounding in my head every day all day, and all night. I'm like the girl on baby mama movie that watches every baby i see, and every pregnant woman I see.

I'm scared to death about my options left at this point. If our baby doesn't make it, then I am going to apply for another loan (???!!!) OMG! to use DE. I have to... I can't NOT do it.. Does that make sense?

For some reason I don't get the loan, I don't know waht kind of state of mind I'll be in. I honestly fell like I am out of MY MIND at times! I've NEVER in my life been like this with credit... and now I'm sinking farther into debt, and don't care. Please tell me I am not a nut job.

I know I'm getting a little ahead of the game, because our one, could just be THE ONE. and I'm praying that it is. But after all the heartbreak I've been thru, it's hard to be hopeful.. I just want to be surprized by my little angel making it all the way to BFP.

I hope you are all well, I've missed you, and I'm so excited for everyone continuing on with treatment.

I start PIO on friday... (!)

oh yes... I forgot to say too that the first RE I went to told me that if my FSH was over 10 she would seriously recommend DE and not to waste my money on trying with my own eggs. that the chances would be about 4%... I was devastated even though I didn't know my FSH yet. So then I went to my DR. one of the best here.. and my FSH came back 15.5. I told him what she said.. and he said it wasn' t true.

well, of course, I fell in love with him, and wanted to try my own eggs. So here I am today, praying that my one little embie left from decembers cycle is gonna be my one that sticks.

ok I think I'm a total hormonal nut case on estrogen overload. But thanks for listening.

Hugs as always

Janet W

[taka]

Hi Janet, your post made me sad...I know exactly how you feel. Don't feel bad about the long wait to try to be a mama...the point is you are doing it now. It's now that counts and luckily you didn't wait to long because you do have options...I am hoping and praying that your little embie makes it...

[J-LYN]

Taka,

Thanks sweetie. I am glad to see you are moving on with another RE. I think your response to the meds was really good, and you did get alot of eggs too. I have faith that things will go better for you next time around!

July is almost here!

Hugs and have a good day.

Janet

[Inna]

Hi Ladies,
I have been away for almost two months, we went to see my family and now we are back and have started the test for the second IVF, which is going to be in September. I am doing my clomid challenge this week, I keep my fingers crossed for a good enough number and I just had my sonohisterography. That is our update.
J-lyn, MSA, Tamar, good luck with your coming cycles!sticky vibes from us.
Marlynn, so glad to see your pregnancy is going well. Grow baby, grow!

[J-LYN]

Good morning ladies. Update on me.

when I got AF...on the 16th, I went for the ultrasound, and they put me on the esrodial pills 3 x a day, then another ultrsound, and they added four estrogen patches, every 3 days. So Iam a estrogen queen right now. LOL

Yesterday, I went for U/s and they called to tell me that they are gonna thaw my baby two days earllier! My uterus is ready, so I started PIO last night.

Iam so excited, and now just praying and keeping goo thoughts that my baby is gonna survive the thaw, and make it to blast to transfer.

I just keep practicing "the secret" and saying/thinking, How grateful I am to be pregnant.

( you're supposed to put yourself in the moment) for those who aren't familiar with "the secret"

That thought is what makes my heart jump with joy for sure!

Hugs and Blessings

Janet

[taka]

J lyn how did everything go?

[marilynn]

Originally Posted by Inna

Marlynn, so glad to see your pregnancy is going well. Grow baby, grow!

Hi Inna,
I had a miscarriage about a month ago. Our RE said that he would try iui again if he were us since we got pg last time. It miscarried bc of chromosonal abnormality so he said if we got pg it again it could work out. We're starting injectibles in the next couple of days.

[J-LYN]

Taka, sorry I have been away. Things have just not been good, and I was kind of in seclusion.

OUr one embie survived the thaw, and then 2 days later RE said that it was only 3 cell, (shhould be 4 to 8) and then wait til monday (last) for an update again. Then he called and said it's a 10 cell, on day 5 which is not good, it means there is an abnormality, and we won't be able to transfer.

So of course, my questions are What? I see all kinds of 3 and 4 and 6 cell transfers... but I guess they are not on day 5.

So I have a consult today at 3:30. Basically, everything I started 9 months ago is done. and now it's time to stop, or start over with something more likely to give me success.

Egg donation is fine with me, but I'm not sure I'm gonna get the financing, as I've already borrowed 50K that we are all out of pocket on this. It's not the $$.. I want success, you know? We do have equity in our home, but in this market, we can't get it.

SO right now, I'm confused and don't know what to do/go from here. I don't seem to have a clear head.

How are things with everyone? I'll read back and see how things are going... I know some of you were geting ready to to DE cycle.

Hugs to all

Janet

[msa]

Hello fabulous 40+ ladies, I've been in communicado for the last few weeks. My computer developed a severe case of narcolepsy (it would just fall asleep at random times--maddening!)--so it's been in the shop. She's home now, and so far so good.

J-Lyn, my heart goes out to you. I can only imagine what you're going through, but I know that you'll do what's right for you. Just know that whatever you decide, your friends are with you.

As for me, I'm near the end of my 2ww, and surprisingly it's been POAS-temptation free. The only thing that I'm nervous about is how calm I feel--very zen. DP has been wonderful, keeping me busy and laughing. So I think we're just prepared for whatever the outcome of the test on Tuesday. Hoping for the best , but ready for the crossroads conversation with our doctor.

Hugs and baby dust to all!