[mgmsrk]

Don’t forget about public adoptions, they come with very little cost and there are thousands of kids that need families.

[Anavaz]

Hello girls,

A friend of my mom's told her that her OB/GYN has an adoption service. What she does is that the women that go to her and don't want their babies and want an abortion she convinces them to give the baby in adoption. She then takes care of their prenatal treatment and when they give birth they leave the babies at the hospital and the doctor finds them a family.

I called today and she was leaving so they told me to call tomorrow. I can't wait to find out more about it.

[Murphette]

My DH and I decided to go the adoption route as we really do want children. After one miscarriage and two failed IVF cycles we decided to explore other options. Of course, I'm too old now to do another IVF cycle with my own eggs and DE's are just too expensive for us at this point.

We are going through the state. Our state requires us to take 10 weeks of parenting classes, then the home study. I've pretty much completed the application and all the paperwork. We have some references we're still waiting for and we have to start the scrapbook/portfolio. But all in all we're at least on the road.

Due to our ages, we have decided to try to adopt a child between 6 and 10. Since we would like more than one, we are trying to get approved for a sibling group. Evidently because there aren't many potential parents out there willing to take in an "older" child much less more than one, they will try to get us approved as soon as possible. So hopefully this won't be a long wait. We've found that the state agency has been wonderful, very helpful, and very inexpensive. Our state pays for the home study, the attorney fees for the child. They say we may have to pay between $500 and $1000 out of pocket but that this is usually reimbursed.

What I found really amazing is that the state actually pays a stipend to the adoptive family until the child (children) turn 18, plus they keep the child on medicaid and all adopted children get free tuition waivers if they attend a college in the state. I couldn't believe it when they told us that.

Good luck to those of you that are going through the process. May all of our dreams come true.

[sarah16]

Thanks for sharing your story. Good luck with your adoption.

[Kari]

Sarah,

How are things going for you? I found that I was very excited once we were first approved. I bought some gender neutral items too. Now as we're getting further into the wait - it's getting harder (especially now that my sister is pregnant again).

I know our portfolio has gone out a few times - but haven't been selected yet. Our social worker called us about one opportunity in which if we were called the next day, we needed to be ready to pick up an infant boy from the hospital and stay in MN for a week until paperwork went through. We were not selected. Now I get my hopes up every time the phone rings. Since then we decided to get a little more prepared- took an infant CPR class and bought a few more baby essentials just in case.

I was talking to a friend the other day about the wait and she commented that the average woman has to wait 9 months typically - so I shouldn't be so impatient. Ugh! I put in my 9 months plus another 22 months more!

How are you passing the time?

[sarah16]

Hello Kari!!

I am a teacher so I have been keeping busy with winding down the year. I also have a 5 year old who is going to kindergarten in the fall, she is always keeping me busy. The last thing is that I joined the YMCA and I"m going to take a boot camp class and yoga class this summer.

I am still waiting for someone to look at my portfolio, but I'm excited about it.

[mgmsrk]

I am so excited!!! Yesterday I received a call from our Provinces adoption coordinator and she is moving us to the top of the list to complete our home study, we may have it done in the next 2 months. Yea!!!!!!

Now this is mostly exciting because it generally takes about 2 years to do that in the public system here. But when we started the process again one of the kids we expressed interest in on the Federal waiting kids website is from my Province. So they are very interested in getting us approved ASAP. Even if that child is not meant to be ours at least our paperwork will be in order so we will be ready when ours comes along. And we just met with a privet social worker to get the process done faster and now we can save the $1500 that she charges.

[mittons]

Originally Posted by mgmsrk

I am so excited!!! Yesterday I received a call from our Provinces adoption coordinator and she is moving us to the top of the list to complete our home study, we may have it done in the next 2 months. Yea!!!!!!

Now this is mostly exciting because it generally takes about 2 years to do that in the public system here. But when we started the process again one of the kids we expressed interest in on the Federal waiting kids website is from my Province. So they are very interested in getting us approved ASAP. Even if that child is not meant to be ours at least our paperwork will be in order so we will be ready when ours comes along. And we just met with a privet social worker to get the process done faster and now we can save the $1500 that she charges.

What great news! It always helps when things seem to move a little faster than planned. Good luck!

[rebecca0130]

good for you MGM - that is great.

[sarah16]

How exciting!!!

I have good news too. I finished my portfolio!!!

[mgmsrk]

Thank you all, I hope every thing goes smoothly. We are sitting down tomorrow to answer all of our portfolio questions, seems like a thousand.

Sarah, finishing your Portfolio that is great you did it in record time. Good luck!

[CryingInside]

Hi everyone!

I have fantastic news and it involves Sarah being my adoption big sister!!!! We have decided to skip IVF for now and do adoption instead!!!! It was a hard decision, but here we are...now where do we go? LOL!

There is soooo much information. I just started by reading this thread all the way through with my pad of paper and pen writing down everything! We know we have to first decided between international and domestic and we have to start looking at different agencies.

Any advice or information would be appreciated. I'm from Indiana so I'm not sure what kind of laws there are. I'm off to research that now.

[sarah16]

Steph- Another suggestion, go to the library and check out some books that are all about the different kinds of adoption. That was very helpful for me.

[CryingInside]

I am gathering information like a squirrel gathers nuts!

I've got a question though. Were your dh's involved in the entire process or did you do most of the research, ect. and just let them know what you found out? Dh was certainly not very involved in the ART process and as far as I know he never once looked up any information on it. He seems to be taking the same approach on adoption. He said he just doesn't want to think about IF and that was why he was so uninvolved before, but now I don't know. I talk to him about different things I've found and he listens, but I just get a feeling that he's not as excited as he says he is. GRR!

[MamaSoon]

Stephanie, Now seems like a fantastic time to not only get DH involved but to get him to be a partner and start the parenting process. There are many action oriented aspects to the adoption process and it seems like husbands can really get involved in those.

We aren't far into the process ourselves. One foot in and one foot out. But the first task I gave DH was to read three books on adoption and then give me the low down. I secretly read some on my own but I wanted him to get into reading what it takes for each different type of adoption. DH doesn't talk about it or think about it as much as I do but he can power through tasks and the reading one was really helpful in getting some of the ideas into his head slowly. I just gave him a month to read the three books with lots of encouragement.

Good luck!