[Nutmegmlk]

This is my first time in any support group. I have been trying to get pregnant for a little over 5 years. I have had every test in the book, and still no answers. My two best friends got pregnant right before we moved to Arizona. One tried to get pregnant for a year before concieving, so I wasnt upset when she finally concieved. However, my other friend got pregnant on her first month of trying. Now every time I hear her voice or anyone talks about her baby, I cry. I couldn't even look at her or talk to her for the first month without crying. I feel like a horrible person, but I can't help it. I try really hard to force myself to be happy for them, but its hard. I was IMing one of them today about how happy I am, but I was crying the whole time. Does anyone else seem to have this problem?

[jencat215]

Oh sweetie, all of us go through this constantly! We know how you feel. to our little group! So, have you done any treatments (IUI, IVF)? What is your next step on this IF road?

[Nutmegmlk]

I have not done any treatments yet, other than clomid and injections. I had every test in the book done right before we moved. These were in preperation for IUI. We (my DH and I) moved to kind of get away from things for awhile and I lost insurance in the move. So Im kind of in a waiting mode until we find a new insurance carrier that will cover fertility.

[mdbrum16]

I too have been TTC for almost 5 years. My best friend got pregnant on the first month of trying. The only reason they started trying when they did was because of the problems we were having. She had her shower in Sept. and I was dreading it, but it went wonderful. She had her baby a couple of weeks ago and we went and saw her and I was ready for a break down, but somehow pulled through. It really seems it is getting a little easier. I used to cry when I thought of her even being pregnant. Now I am just coping.

[TiffanyW]

Sorry you are so down. But it is perfectly understandable. It took me until the day my SIL had my niece to quit wanting to cry everytime I saw her. I know I haven't been trying nearly as long as you but I also know how much it hurts to see someone so easily get what you have been so desperatley longing and waiting for. I just have to constantly remind myself that their fertility has nothing to do with my infertility. Big *hugs* to you sweetie! I hope you can find some good insurance soon and get that long awaited .

[jenedens6102]

Yes and No. I had this problem earlier on. We've also been trying for almost 5 years, it'll be 5 years in December. We were the second couple to get married in our group of friends and the first couple to start trying. My best friend got pregnant literally two months later. While I was so happy for her part of me kept it up like it was a race. We had to be pregnant together. Then another year passes and DH's best friend gets his fiance pregnant the very weekend that she moved up here, no kidding! That was also the weekend of our first IUI so I had hope. But after the year of failures and then the IUIs weren't working I started to feel this horrible resentment towards them. Why was it so easy for them and not for me. Fast forward to today and we have welcomed over 30 children to our friends and family in the past 4 1/2 years. It's been rough but over time I've learned to love them and accept them all. I feel blessed to have all of these beautiful children and friends around me. Just be honest with them and let them know it hurts you because you want to experience it yourself and it just seems like the opportunity has passed you yet again. Some of our friends don't truly understand the struggle and think that by telling us all the details and sharing so much that we can live vicariously through them. They just want to help us, involve us and keep us close. But what they don't realize is sometimes it does just the opposite. But be honest with them. If they are your true friends they'll understand. You need them too!

[Macams]

to this Group...You are in the right place!!!
I know exactly how you are feeling, I can't get over the bitterness that I feel towards my BIL Girlfriend!!! I can barley stand to be around her!!!! We are having to get together with the family this weekend (Saturday evening) at their house!!!! Ughhhhhh! NOT looking forward to this! I am normally this outgoing, loud, fun girl when we all get together, but lately at the gatherings, I have stayed pretty quiet, I don't know what I am supposed to do about this!!!
They were NOT trying to get preggo...IN FACT...she was complaining to me just 3 months before conception that she felt like she didn't fit in with the family b/c her and my BIL were not married... She also was telling me how her BCP didn't seem to be working...I told her that she had better be careful...Knowing that this was the last thing that the BIL wanted at the this time!!! She didn't listen to me thoguh, 2 months later and preggo she is!!! I think I have trouble with this b/c I know our conversations before all of this happened... I am bitter towards her...EVERYTIME I talk to her, she thrives on telling me some outrageous Preggo symptom that she is dealing with at that time!!! I told her that I would appreciate it if she would just please remember that it is very hard for me to deal with preggo people right now!!! AS the more time that passes that we are TTC the harder it gets! I was TTC before my SIL and she got preggo 1 month after my 2nd Miscarriage...VERY HARD!!! But I just kept my hope alive that we would get preggo before her baby was born...Yeah right!!! Ha My niece just turned 1 in September!!! More treatments and more appointments...Month to month!!! STILL NO pregnancy here!!! HARDEST thing in the world to get through!!!! AND I have had my fair share of MAJOR heartbreak...
I hope that you get through this!!! Know that you are in the right place to vent and for others to understand!!! This is one of the MAIN reasons that I felt I needed to find online support!!! THIS REASON right here...People that get preggo so easily and those that were not even TRYING!!!
I THINK I JUST WENT OFF!!!! CAN YOU SAY HORMONES?!?!
I hope that each and every one of you has a WONDERFUL weekend and please do excuse my ranting...I know I can really sound nasty!!! HA...I am going to CHURCH on SUNDAY!!! GOD is calling!!!!
Love you all Girls! Ha Love Stacy

[carina]

Originally Posted by jenedens6102

Yes and No. I had this problem earlier on. We've also been trying for almost 5 years, it'll be 5 years in December. We were the second couple to get married in our group of friends and the first couple to start trying. My best friend got pregnant literally two months later. While I was so happy for her part of me kept it up like it was a race. We had to be pregnant together. Then another year passes and DH's best friend gets his fiance pregnant the very weekend that she moved up here, no kidding! That was also the weekend of our first IUI so I had hope. But after the year of failures and then the IUIs weren't working I started to feel this horrible resentment towards them. Why was it so easy for them and not for me. Fast forward to today and we have welcomed over 30 children to our friends and family in the past 4 1/2 years. It's been rough but over time I've learned to love them and accept them all. I feel blessed to have all of these beautiful children and friends around me. Just be honest with them and let them know it hurts you because you want to experience it yourself and it just seems like the opportunity has passed you yet again. Some of our friends don't truly understand the struggle and think that by telling us all the details and sharing so much that we can live vicariously through them. They just want to help us, involve us and keep us close. But what they don't realize is sometimes it does just the opposite. But be honest with them. If they are your true friends they'll understand. You need them too!

I couldn't agree with this statement more. I have said to my DH more times then I care to remember "why is ___ so insensitive to me? don't they understand that I feel like they are bragging? especailly those who get bfp on the 1st try! Why do they feel the need to tell me that? they know how difficult its been for us!" ... but in the end I realize that its all because they just do not understand. Thats what makes this forum so important & why I spend at least an hour a day here!

I hope that you are able to obtain an insurance policy that covers IF soon. And good luck to you on this IF journey!



Me - age, 28
Hubby - age, 34
Dx - unknown at this point

Oct. 2001 - TTC

May 2004 - 1st IVF cycle , but resulted in an ectopic , 2, 2 day embies transferred, no leftovers

Sept 2004 - 2nd IVF cycle ! - 2, 5 day blasts transferred - 3, 6 day blastocyst leftover for freezing

June 2005 - Baby Girl Born ... 2 hour
unmedicated labor. The universe paid back for all those proj shots that day. Though it was painful it was fast & furious. Best night of my life!

Sept 2007 FET - all 3 blasts thawed - 2, 6 days blasts transferred -

Oct 24th - 1st IUI (no meds) 40M post wash!
Oct. 30th - b/w to check projes.
Nov. 9th - beta, if AF hasn't arrived yet.

[kathy55432]

I was trying to adopt and two of my friends got pregant. we we talking about have a triple baby shower. I end up throwing a baby shower for them and I have still not adopted. It was a very hard thing for me to do. But I threw the shower with a smile.

[marcia9043]

My Friend and I ended up pregnant at the same time after me trying for many months and her trying for one month... mine ended in an ectopic and she has a beautiful 15 month old girl and everytime I think about her I think to myself my baby should be that age now too.