[anne1140]

DH and I are considering skipping IVF and going straight to embryo donation, since none of it is covered by insurance. There is a huge difference in price: IVF with ICSI will be about $13,000, which we can get together in about a year, but if it fails, we will have no savings left. We are also not planning on freezing any embryos, for religious reasons, so really, we only have one shot. Embryo donation, on the other hand, is about $5,000 total per try, so a lot more reasonable.

Am I crazy for considering this? I always see people trying this route after IVF has failed. (We don't want to do sperm donation for religious reasons, so don't bring this up, please.)

[hopprn]

Anne,
I think it is a great option. I recently "adopted" embryos and unfortunately they did not take. But I would love to try again. We also didnt use donor sperm because it didnt feel right for us. Whever God leads you is the right option. Maybe he is leading you to adopt some embryos that need a chance for life and not create more. I dont think your crazy at all for going straight to embryo donation as long both you & your spouse are comfortable with it! Good Luck!

[Deker]

I might be considering this route to after since I just had a BFN and I'm only trying DIUI 4 times.

[LGB]

I think it is a great idea to consider-more cost conscious and possibly a higher success rate, if you are comfortable with no bio connection.

We are doing donor egg IVF and I can tell you that I would have preferred to skip right to them knowing what we know now! It would have saved us a lot of time and money!

Good luck and of course no, you are not crazy, you are being very smart about it

[goferret]

I think it is a wonderful option, too. We are looking to adopt embryos at miracleswaiting.org. I have been trying to find IVF clinics nearby (Boston, Providence etc.) that offer embryo donation but when I called they sounded confused. When they told me they did not have embryos for donation I asked what happens to all the unused embryos. They said that they just belonged to the owners. I asked if they tell their clients they can donated them to other infertile couples but they just responded they didn't know what the counselors tell the patients about that. Is anyone one else surprised by that? I guess I thought people would be told they can allow their embryos to be adopted since there is such a need.

[StillWaiting410]

My DH and I are going through another round of IVF. The RE has asked us if we want to donate unused embryos to a couple/person in need when our family is complete. This costs us extra money for extra tests, but I can see their purpose. My question is... can I donate anonymously (being my labs came out clean from the extra tests), or do they need all my information and a couple/person picks me by a profile?
Just wondering what happens in the bigger picture.

[Igloochic]

No you can't really donate anynomously. It's the same as sperm and egg donation, information about donors is important. Does that mean that the people who get your emby's know your name? No not at all, though records are kept at the clinic for genetic issues in the future.

At our clinic donating embies is a huge discussion you have at the beginning. We have the option of donating, destroying or giving our embies to science. We have 20 frosties we likely won't use (I'm preggers and we won't do another round...we didn't want this many frosties LOL)

Our clinic does significant screening of future parents receiving donor embies. Not having gone through IVF is not a way to get yourself disqualified. But they do want to make sure it's not a whim (the same with receiving donor eggs/sperm or just going through IVF). I think we'll be donating ours to a mix of science and future families (DH's choice and my choice mixed). We're studying the options, but our wish is a particular focus on gay and lesbian partnerships because donor embies are harder for those folks to get. We have to figure out how we specify that stuff...but it's an option for most embryo donors (As well as to say no to certain groups...Ie no catholics, family of Sarah Palin, etc)

I wish you all luck in your search. You might consider calling a local RE who works with IVF clinics because they tend to know the policies of each of the facilities they work with.

[Violara]

I just wanted to say, Igloochic, that I think I love you! You are my kind of lady. Congrats on the recent !

[StillWaiting410]

If there are no health problems with my DH and I (other than IF), but our family history kind of sucks, would we still be considered by someone. Family history includes history of breast chancer, strokes, heard disease... all relatives, but not us. I'm just afraid we are going to pay the extra money and not even qualify to donate. It's hard when times are tough and everything we're doing as it is cost $$$.
Sorry for all the questions, you've been a great help so far.

[hopprn]

stillwaiting- When we adopted embryos through our RE office we paid for the genetic couples lab work. (I don;t know if they paid and then were reimbursed??) But the cost was $3000 which included administrative fees, lab work and reimbursement of cryofreezing for the genetic couple. You might want to ask your RE about this.

[kai]

Best of luck to you Igloochic...We are 2 women in 2nd year of TTC...7 IUI's with donor sperm, clomid, HCG were
unsuccessful...now moving on to injectibles - lupron, menopur, HCG trigger. We briefly explored embryo adoption but were not able to find a clinic where they would even talk to same sex partners. (we are legally married in California). It is heartwarming to see attitudes like yours...thank you for being so open minded and open hearted.

[Deker]

Kai: I'm running into the same problems too. I'm a single lesbian mom and while I could hide my sexual orientation if I wanted to, I don't feel comfortable misrepresenting my familiy to the donating parents. I found that clinics tend to be more accepting of "non-traditional" families verses adoption agencies. However, I know of one agency that you can use if you live in WV, NY, CT or MA. Please PM me for more details; they will work with anyone - including same-sex couples.

[juststarting]

I just wanted to pop in here and say that I am going straight to Embryo Adoption. I'm single, and actually don't even know that I have any fertility issues. For a variety of reasons, I've decided to start with Embryo Adoption. I'm working with a fertility clinic which just happens to have a donor embryo program. I've been on the list since March, and at the beginning of July I was 3rd on the list.
Like you, I have found that most people have gone through all kinds of other treatments first, so I just wanted to give you a shout out to say that I'm in your boat too!

[anilorak13ska]

[quote=Igloochic]
We have to figure out how we specify that stuff...but it's an option for most embryo donors (As well as to say no to certain groups...Ie no catholics, family of Sarah Palin, etc) [quote]

Igloochic, I hope I'm misunderstanding you here, bc as a Catholic who may be looking into embryo adoption down the road, I feel offended.

Not that you would have this preference to not have your embryos go to a Catholic family, since that is entirely your choice, but that you would throw this out so matter-of-fact, as if it'd be obvious that no one wants their child to go to a Catholic family.

Like I said, I hope I am totally misunderstanding your intentions, but I couldn't let the comment go unnoticed.

Karolina

[kai]

hi Deker,

my partner and I conceived in July only to miscarry the end of August. We have been in a waiting/holding period after her DNC. She is finally
regulating and we hope to start again next month.
I am increasingly interested in either embryo donation as we have invested our entire life savings (about $16000 to date) and dread the thought of going into further debt. We know the end results, a healthy baby, is worth all of the heartache and money...
wish there was a way for us to find a community to have embryos that need a loving, home