[Tanya324]

It's my bday tomorrow and I will be leaving my 20's behind I was always sure that I would have my 2.5 kids by now and my home I always dreamed of a loving husband you know, what do they call it the american dream only I 'm canadian..... I have the home I always wanted and a great husband a dog, a job that I love but I don't have a baby so I am not a mommy and I want to be one soooo bad. when I was young I always planned I would have 2 kids by now when I took the long way to the wedding I said I would have one by now but I don't have any and my heart is breaking I don't want to be 30 and still have no signs that this hell is almost over. I can't move onto a RE because I have to put a new roof on my house I would love to take that money and pay for my baby but you can't bring a baby home to a house that leaks(it's not that bad yet but if we wait we will probably be sorry this winter) so it's going to take us at leat 6 months to save up the money again so I will be 31 by the time I am a mom unless god notices me which I really doubt or he listens to my crys I sure he will not, he has never listened before!!! so for tomorrow I don't really want to get out of bed which really sucks because I have always been the person to make everyone laugh I have been like that for as long as I can remember and holidays and birthdays I am always so excited for them even when it's not mine I just love to have fun but I have not had any fun in what feel s like a very long time and this weekend is the big weekend every may long weekend me and all my friends have a big a bbq at my sisters there are like five of us who all have bdays in may and we always have this party for our bdays and I want to go I need to have some fun but this will be my first big gatering since my dr told me he could not do anything for me and there will be people there who I have not seen since then and I am always the life of the party I get that all the time when I say I am coming somewhere people are all like we are going to have fun tonite if tanya's coming out. this just suck soooo much!!! this year I am the only one who has no kids it is the first year my last childless friends are not childless anymore

[30somethingmom]

Hi Tanya,
I am sending you some big hugs! I've been where you are not so long ago. I had also planned to have 2 kids by the time I was 30. I felt so sad and disappointed when that didn't happen. It was hard to watch friends and family members get married and have a couple of kids when we were still childless.

But one day our dream finally came true. It was much later than I had planned (I was almost 37 when our daughter was born.), but everything worked out perfectly and I am so thrilled to finally be a mom!

My point is that no matter how down or hopeless you feel, it can and will happen for you one day too. It may not go exactly the way you want it to or go according to your plan, but it will still be wonderful.

Hang in there! And go out and do something fun for your birthday -- you deserve it!

Take care,

[einstein]

Well, the best things in life aren't planned. I always imagined I'd get married to a ritzy lawyer or business guy who wore these amazing suits and drove a convertible and was Catholic. My DH is Jewish and didn't even have a job when we met -- let alone a convertible! Today, we're happily married and I have a wonderful hubby even though he doesn't fit the "mold" I envisioned when I was younger.

Also, maybe there is a reason why you didn't have kids in your 20s. I am more mature now than I was 10 years ago so I'm glad I had the boys when I was 30.

[einstein]

Oh, and happy birthday, too!!! Enjoy your special day. Do something fun because you deserve it!

[AveryL]

Your 30's will be great, look at it this way you didn't have the children WHEN you were 30 but you will have them to enjoy WHILE you are in your 30's. I feel like I know so much more about myself and the world in general now than I did in my 20's, I'm more patient, kinder, gentler and just feel more "ready" to have a strong marraige and raise a really good person(people). Being 30 really is fun, I hope you enjoy it soon!!!!! Go eat lots of chocolate cake with chocolate frosting and some chocolate ben and jerry icecream. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!