[jennieves]

May I join? Our little one had a slow heart rate last tuesday, and Saturday it was confirmed no heart beat. Probable D and C this week. Hanging in there...

It is good to see you erin and Claudia,wish it was better circumstances.

[chuchu]

Jennieves, I wish the circumstances were different also. I am glad that you didn't have to wait more days and your D&C will come soon. You will be feeling better some days after that.

DH gave me a surprise and got some tickets for tonight go see "Wicked". I have to fix some lunch and then will be leaving.

Hope everybody is doing fine today.

[tamtam]

jaime, I agree and wish I had done the same earlier. You are always in my thoughts (love ya)

[historyteach]

wow ladies, it seems like there is a pretty large bunch of us, which i find so sad that so many of us are going through this. sorry i have been MIA - i had to work at my part-time job friday and saturday and yesterday we decided to have a drunk day. went to Damon's had some frosty beverages and wooped up on the trivia game

i know how hard it is for everyone and please know that i am here as well as the rest of us so please feel free to vent ... i know that i will

missy - oh sweetie, i am so sorry. how are things going with you? have you thought of the next step i know that cash is tight but you are in my thoughts and prayers.

marilyn - you are so strong with going with a natural miscarriage, i will be honest i had a d&e the last time because i didn't want the pain. you are such a strong person

erin - hope the headaches and the other are doing better. i was cleared for sex after my 2 week checkup and i was told as long as you are not bleeding prior to the the D&E - i forgot to respond about trying again - once you get down to zero that would be like the first day of your period so you will get AF approx 6 weeks after your D&E. last cycle i was put on bcps as soon as i got down to zero so that i could fit into the next cycle at my clinic - it did work...sorta, so don't give up!!!

sherry - i hope that you get some answers that you are looking for from the testing. i found out the sex of my first miscarriage, when the nurse asked if i wanted to know i just blurted out yes before i really thought about it. i know that i lost a little boy and although i am thankful for the information it made the situation more difficult for me because it went from a baby to a boy... so you may want to discuss with DH if you want to know the results

jenn - have you decided to go natural or are you having a d&e - regardless of your decision you are in my thoughts and prayers

nicole and sandra - hugs, i am glad that you decided to join, i just wish that we didn't have to have this thread

blessings to all and i pray that we all find peace and get to hold our miracle one day soon

[missywojo]

Originally Posted by historyteach

wow ladies, it seems like there is a pretty large bunch of us, which i find so sad that so many of us are going through this.

Jamie, I was thinking the exact same thing as I was catching up on all the posts since Friday. I didn't realize there were so many of us that slow/no HB and then miscarriage/D&C happened too. That is really sad to me. Also, what part time job do you have? Is it just when school's out?

My DH and I are celebrating our 8 year wedding anniversary tomorrow! We went out on Saturday to a community theatre (in Chelsea Mich, owned by Jeff Daniels) and a wonderful dinner. We had a very nice time. I will probably have another mini celebration after work tomorrow too--just grill out some steaks.

I have to go tomorrow morning to see if my beta is down to zero yet. So that's 4 weeks after the D&C. Does anyone know when I should get a period and start a new cycle??????

Claudia--how was "Wicked"??? That is coming back to Detroit this December and I was thinking of getting tix for us and the in-laws.

To those still getting their genetic testing, I did not want to find out the sex. I would rather just call our baby our baby and not know if it was a girl or boy. I didn't want it to be that concrete.

Everyone else, Welcome to all the girls who have joined our group. I hope everyone had a good weekend and will have a great week coming up.

[Pricklecushion]

Hi Ladies,

I would like to join too. I had an ectopic diagnosed in early July and had to have methotrexate.
I am still feeling some cramping and am not yet back to my normal self. Things are getting better though. Slowly but surely.

Jaime,
Thank you for starting this thread.

-Teresa

[missywojo]

Theresa, Sorry to hear about your ectopic.

[ekburke]

Hi Girls!

to all the newcomers. I hope you are all doing well.

I am having a rough day. Do you ever feel like your DH has no clue what you have been through? I love my DH but lately he has been acting as though myy life should be back to normal. Physically I am still not 100%...I just had surgery less than two weeks ago.

I know I am ranting, I just wish he would do something romantic for me...just because.

After all we have been through to get pregnant in the first place, I feel completely unattractive...anyone else have these feelings?

I go for another beta test tomorrow....I swear I felt like I was Oing yesterday and today. Perhaps my beta is back to normal !

Thanks for letting me vent!

[chuchu]

Welcome Teresa!!!

Erin, time will helps us heal physically and mentally. DH has been very supportive with me but I don't want to abuse. He has also gone through the same loss as me and even he is not crying the whole day, I can feel his sadness. Yesterday he told me he won't do any other treatment until I am completely recovered.

Missywojo, I lived in Ann Arbor for three years. I miss sooo much Michigan!! Wicked was amazing. We had fun. I loved two songs that really gave some inspiration in these probing days.

On Saturday I saw Larry King and they were talking about the power of the mind; how what you think becomes reality. I am a clinical psychologist and gave me some thougths on how to regather myself after my m/c. I confirmed that I am the only one that can decide when to start feeling better. There is nothing or no one that can do it for me. Nothing that I can purchase can help: shopping, traveling, eating, drinking, etc. It has to come from within me.

Now I need to get the stength and motivation. Time will help me.

[missywojo]

Erin, I feel like my DH can step it up a notch sometimes. IMO, he (and most guys) can be kind of self-absorbed sometimes. He's not very good on coming up with romantic ideas of his own. I agree with the not feeling very attractive too. We've been so focused on fertility -- there's little romance left in it. I was supposed to go for beta tomorrow too, but they moved it to Thursday now. I hope it's back at zero for you, so you can move on to another cycle.

Claudia, I went to UM, so lived in A2 for 6 years. What a great time. I have football tix and am avid tailgater, so I am back there many Saturdays in the Fall. I have not been to the A2 Art Fair in years though. I am thinking about getting those Wicked tix. Did your DH like it? And, I was a Clinical Social Worker for about 7 years.

Have a good night girls!

[jennieves]

Hey girls,
I decided to go with a D and C. I work in surgical services as an RN, so I know my surgeon. He went above and beyond to get me scheduled for tomorrow. BUt now I am starting to have some spotting, I think I will probably still have the procedure, just to make sure it is all cleared out.

Erin- I think we talked about this. But I do understand. Me and my hubby had a major blow out yesterday. BUt we came to an understanding and are going to work on making it better from both sides. SOmetime I feel like I don't have much to give him (he started a new business and wants my support). But I told him from the beginning it will be hard for me to be there 100%, when I need him here for me. I am trying to be better...BUt I rather him not work 7 days a week when all this stuff is going on YOu know??

claudia- that is really supportive of you hubby to do something nice. Let us know how wicked it. I have always wanted to see it.

Everyone else-lots of healing vibes your way. And girls lets kick some butt next time and have smooth sailing pregnancy's-we deserve it!!

[HananMG]

Hi everyone,

I am so sorry that all of you are going through this and it will take a long time to heal. But we all have to find our way, at least that is what I still tell myself. I personally had Jan 2007 suspected ectopic treated with MTX and then Aug 8, 2007 had D&C. So I am coming up on 1 year for my 2nd loss.

I am glad you all are banding together for support. God Speed and God Bless all of you. WE are survivers!

Hanan

[Pricklecushion]

Hi girls,

Thank you Missy.
Hi Claudia! I saw Wicked last year and loved it. It almost made me cry during the song right before intermission.
Good luck tomorrow Jenni!

Funny I am an mft intern. Seems like there are a lot of us helpers on here
Erin, I totally understand where you are coming from. When I found out about my ectopic my husband's 13 year old daughter was in town from Colorado which made it really hard for me to get any support. My husband had no idea how to balance his time between me and his daughter and his work/school. He was completely clueless in that area, but we've talked about it a lot since and I think he's learning. Hopefully, we won't have such a crazy clash of events again though.

[chuchu]

Jennieves, the night before D&C they gave me something that made me bleed and cramp. I couldn't sleep at all. I thought that maybe it was enough and that I didn't need the D&C, but nope, I had to have one either way. I think it is better that way so we know that everything is gone.

Today was my first day without any pain or discomfort related to m/c. My stress levels have been Ok.... everything is so related.

Teresa, I loved "We can defy gravity" the song just before the intermission. It really touched my heart. DH liked Wicked.... but he says that in general "musicals are not his thing".

[historyteach]

Amen on the whole Dh thing, i know that we are polar opposites, i need to talk to get things worked through and i need someone there to have a conversation with not just a listener, my DH is so quiet and does not like talking about emotions, so this has been a rather difficult time.

and the idea of not feeling attractive, between the 20 lbs that i have put on in the past year along with my DH there will i bleed - well it just wasn't the greatest thing...

please do not hesitate to rant.... because here goes mine... i teach summer school, all students who have failed and are now attempting to pass... ok, at least they are trying. i have this kid that is labeled so he thinks that he doesn't have to do anything, i had him during the school year and all he would do is doodle and then say he doesn't understand so that he doesn't have to do work. he complains about everything, and in a nut shell, he is just such a little s*it!!! so yesterday, i was talking about problems in India and China about overpopulation - and guess what the most annoying child i have ever had got a girl pregnant, they are not together and it just hit me the wrong way... after everything that i have gone thru recently, i just wanted to slap the kid. i am doing much better, but man, it seems like fate is screwing with me.

ok, i feel much better. i hope that everyone has a great tuesday and i pray that we each find peace!!!