chuchu...ekburke....onemiracle...anyone else with fresh wounds - Page 8

chuchu · #**106** (**permalink**) 08-15-2008, 09:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by historyteach

Erin & Claudia - i am so glad that your appointment went so well, you have given me some things that i want to bring up with my Re.

i have called my old RE, that i did medicated IUIs to determine if there is anything else that we can do to figure out why i start bleeding at 6 weeks.

i don't know about the rest of you but the idea that i am starting another cycle makes me have something else to think about and not obsess about the ones that i lost.

jana - i hoep that things went well today and you are in my thoughts and prayers.

i hope that each of you are finding peace and love in your lives!!

Jaime,

That's the right attitude to have starting a new cycle. Now you have to focus all your energy in your FET and taking care after your BFP. You know how much I admire you for your strength!!

Try to relax, meditate, exercise, go out with friends... those were the things that really helped me.

jana · #**107** (**permalink**) 08-15-2008, 11:44 AM

Erin, I don't know about how vicious AF will be, but my RE said nothing inside for a week, so I would think you'd be fine using tampons after a couple of weeks.

historyteach · #**108** (**permalink**) 08-15-2008, 12:45 PM

jana - how are you feeling sweetie? you haven't been far from my thoughts!!

erin - tampons are fine. my AF was a little more rough than usual but than again, i have been on so many hormones for so long, i can't really tell what AF would be like without all the drugs. make sure that you have some pain killers. i had to spend one evening on the sofa and not move. good luck

i hope that the rest of you are healing and enjoying the good stuff in your life

Onemiracle · #**109** (**permalink**) 08-15-2008, 04:41 PM

Now that the mc is officially starting, we are going to tell my family about the mc. They know we are doing IVF, but we don't share every detail with them.

For various reasons, we decided to share this news with them this time.

Any tips? I want to keep it short

historyteach · #**110** (**permalink**) 08-15-2008, 06:02 PM

i don't know if there is any advice to tell people, just speak from your heart and tell them what ever you feel comfortable. good luck and i hope talking about the situation brings you some peace in this tragedy

LisaG620 · #**111** (**permalink**) 08-16-2008, 07:28 PM

Hi ladies, I was wondering if I could join you. Claudia - thank you for letting me know about this thread. For those of you who do not know my story - My DH and I had our first IVF this June/ July. We started with a very low beta of 8 and were devasted because we thought that we were done. Then it went up to 19, so we got a little more excited. 4 days later we were up to 117 and RE didn't need to do any more betas. We were both excited, yet I had a nagging feeling in the back of my head that something was wrong. I really did not have any preggo symptoms and knew that low betas usually meant something was wrong. For about a week we got to be excited and I finally got to be pregnant...it felt so GOOD! Then I started bleeding and knew it was over...DH still had hope. I had a beta the next day and it went down to 105. A week later I had a follow up beta and it was only down to 104. I then had an u/s and they confirmed an ectopic pregnancy. I had a shot of methotrexate that day.

I am having good days and bad days, but I know that I will be ok eventually. I am a teacher and I can not wait for school to start so I finally have something else to think about.

Thanks for letting me share my story and join you ladies. This is such a wonderful place to get and give support.

Sanda · #**112** (**permalink**) 08-16-2008, 07:48 PM

Lisa. I'm so sorry you and your husband are going through this. My thoughts are with you both

historyteach · #**113** (**permalink**) 08-16-2008, 08:01 PM

lisa - i am so sorry about your lose. i know the pain that you are going thru is all to familiar. i hope that you find more good days than bad. i am also a teacher and am looking forward to going back, well sort of. i have been asked by everyone that i have run into if there is any news, and it is really hard to keep dealing with it over and over again. i hope that you body and soul heal quickly and that you find peace. You and your dh are in my thoughts and prayers

Onemiracle · #**114** (**permalink**) 08-16-2008, 09:02 PM

Lisa -- Welcome.

I am so sorry about your loss. Those beta numbers can be tricky. I hope have a fast recovery.

- Onemiracle

jana · #**115** (**permalink**) 08-17-2008, 07:15 AM

Lisa,

to our little healing place. Wish none of us had to be here.

Jamie, I am so getting excited about football season as well, but I'm a college football junkie. We are hoping to go to the A&M vs. Iowa State game and maybe one of two others if they are close. I just love the weather and atmosphere of the whole thing.

Well, D&C went like it was expected to. We elected not to do testing on it, because the RE told us that it wouldn't give us any helpful info for the next cycle, and I didn't want to know the sex. She did say that we would do karyotyping and poss. PGD. The poor recovery room had to deal with my emotional upset as I came out of the anesthesia. I cried for almost 30min. straight. They were all so wonderful just to let me get it all out and be so understanding. We go in on Thurs. to see where we go from here. DH and I have spent a couple of days on the fold out couch snuggling and watching movies. It really was comforting just to be with each other and shut out the world. I think I am doing remarkably well. I'm trying to handle all of this with grace and faith.

Ladies you are always in my prayers.

historyteach · #**116** (**permalink**) 08-17-2008, 07:35 AM

jana - i am glad that you are begining to heal, that is amazing... laying on the sofa with your loved one, i am sure that it helped with the healing process. i love the fact that you said you are trying to deal with faith and grace, i have tried, i hope that you have more success than i did. you are in my thoughts and prayers

chuchu · #**117** (**permalink**) 08-17-2008, 09:38 AM

Lisa, welcome!! As Jana said, it really is "our little healing place".

Jana, having a D&C was also very emotional for me. It didn't help that I had already have 6 hours of pain and zero sleep the night before. I cried the whole time they were preparing me. I had the terrible thought: "How did I get here?" and "WHY??". In those times I was so upset with God. As time has gone by, I am also healing spiritually.

After D&C, I did exactly the same with DH and felt so good. We also shutted down the whole world. I did not want to talk even my parents (I am very close to them). Believe me you are in the right path to recovery.

To all the teachers here, working will help you. My first days at work were hard because I was in pain. But since I recovered physically, I am back 100%. And that, felt so good! Reassuring myself that I could be ME again. I work directly with customers and you have to be nice/smile/chat the whole day. Realizing I could smile again and watch pregnant women and babies around me, without feeling terribly upset (but manegeable) felt amazing.

I hope everybody is having a great weekend. I worked yesterday and then came back to watch the Olympics. If Dara Torres who is 41 is competing against women that are have here age and winning medals, why shouldn't I have the stamina to continue and win my IVF journey?

Love to all!

jana · #**118** (**permalink**) 08-17-2008, 10:43 AM

Jamie, I think you handle all of this with grace. It's hard at times not to be angry with God, but I keep reminding myself of all the wonderful things he has brought into my life.

Claudia, I'm glad to hear that work is a positive thing for you. I am a teacher but having moved to a new state at the beginning of last year, I decided to stay at home. I am trying to find something now that will allow me the flexibility to deal with IVF and work at the same time. I hate subbing, but may have to do it.

I'm beginning to realize how much I like to be in control of my own life, and at the same time realizing I have no control of my life. I am beginning to understand that whatever happens along this journey is up to God, and I have to accept his will. I just pray that I can hear him guiding me along the way, and I can accept what he has in store.

ekburke · #**119** (**permalink**) 08-17-2008, 02:01 PM

Lisa-Welcome! This is a great place to get the support you need! I am so sorry for your loss.

Jana-Glad to hear the D&C went well and that you are on the mend!

I have a question. Did any of you have the antagonist protocol with your IVF cycle. That is what my RE has planned for me. I did well with the standard lupron cycle, but I only got 9 eggs. I want more this time to freeze. I have heard mixed reviews...online it is not well regarded (I think it is far newer than alot of the stuff I may have been reading!) but on here I see lots of women having success. If anyone has any ideas, please let me know.

I hope you all had a relaxing weekend. I head back to school tomorrow for a week of teacher stuff! WHOO HOO!

jana · #**120** (**permalink**) 08-17-2008, 02:55 PM

Erin, I'm not sure if I know the difference btw. protocols. I did BCP, Lupron, then Gonal F, HCG, then trigger. I ended up with 15 eggs but only 12 fertilized. Is that the standard Lupron cycle? I've seen lots of women on here get 20-50 eggs, and not even half of those are mature enough to fertilize........I don't know what they did.