[tomekwa]

I had my NT appointment Thursday and I was suppose to be 12wks 5 days.
We got the most devastating news. Our baby appeared to be only 9wks and there was no heartbeat.
To say that we are heartbroken is an understatement. All I've done since is cry, cry, cry.
My OB is out of town and one of his partner will be the one taking care of me.
According to the u/s I'm too far along and they are suggesting a D&C. They've scheduled it for this monday.
I'm a little freaked out about is but I think i would rather have it done than bleed it out for 2-3weeks.
This was our first pregnancy after a long journey ttc.
Having to wait until monday has been torture, I still feel pregnant and my belly is still there.
I just miss my baby so badly....I want him back.

I really loved being pregnant and I can't wait to be able to try again. I just have no idea how long we'll have to wait and all. Any idea?

What should I expect of the D&C and recovery?

I know that my DH is going to be freaking out. Any words of advice?

[makenalelu]

I know how it feels. I suffered a loss almost 1 year ago...discovered my pregenancy was ectopic around 6 weeks, and it then caused a tubal rupture at 8 weeks.

I know it is hard to see now, but things do get better. I can't speak to the process of the D&C...we had to wait 3 months before TTC again due to the mehtotrexate shot I was given.

Emotionally, it took probably about 2 weeks before I started to feel okay, and a month or so to feel like myself again. I know it is so hard to understand...how can this happen? How can this especially happen to people on this forum who stuggle with IF?

Thinking of you and wishing you the best for the future. It will happen for you!

[crANP]

IM so sorry for your loss.... Did they say what they thought happened? My understanding is its very unusual to have a miscarriage after a normal heart rate

[ara79]

I am so deeply sorry for your loss. My heart aches for all the women that have to endure this. I want you to know that even though it may not feel like it right now, you will be ok. Take it one day at a time and please, please don't rush yourself. Allow yourself time to grieve. One day, I promise, you will hold your baby in your arms and when this happens, whatever you had to endure to get to that point will be worth it. I am praying for you, I know it hurts so much.

[sunny72]

I'm so terribly sorry. I know you must be so sad right now. I found the D&C gave me a sense of closure after they had initially given me cytotec and had been bleeding heavily for a couple of weeks. The procedure didn't give me any further pain and there was only light bleeding afterwards compared to what it was before. Were they going to do another u/s before the D&C? I can imagine you've hardly had time to comprehend what is happening.

[tomekwa]

Thank u ladies. I appreciate the kind words of support. I'm sure that one day I'll see a happier day/time but right now it's just hard.

sunny72 - I'm going to see my ob's partner (my OB is out of town) tomorrow morning before my surgery. I don't think that they'll do any more u/s. Do u think I should request one?
I know that we still have this little hope that they made a mistake somehwere but I think that they know what they're talking about.

crANP - I haven't had the D&C yet. All they told me is that most of the time, there's some kind of chromossomal problem with the baby. Not sure what we'll find out with the D&C.


makenalelu - Thank you sweetie. We;ve cycled together before, I'm so happy for you. I know it's going to take time for us to heal. Thank u for the support.

[Godiva4me]

I am so sorry for your loss... I m/c at almost 7 weeks and did it naturally, however I have had D&C's before. The D&C is easy and relatively little pain afterwards, just like minor pain. Most doctors want you to wait 2 cycles before trying again. I have heard some say try right away though, and others wanted you to wait longer.

Make sure you ask them if they are going to be able to take samples of the baby to test to give you some answers as to what went wrong. (and sometimes the info. lets you make changes or add meds. so it doesn't happen again) I am hoping to try again in Sept.
Again, I am sorry for your loss!

[sunny72]

Wanessa, no, for sure they would have mentioned if they thought another ultrasound were neccesary. I remember wishing I had asked for one last ultrasound before they gave me the cytotec, but I was just clinging onto hope at the time. I'm so sorry you are going through this - my thoughts are with you.

[Kay]

I know there are no words to say that can make you feel better right now, but I am deeply sorry for your loss. I have had three losses so I understand some of the pain you are feeling. I too cried for a long time. Let yourself cry.
I am so glad you know you will be trying again. Keep up the fight. When you do hold that little one in your arms it will be so worth it. You will never forget this little one, but I promise the pain will stop being as raw as it is right now.
ing for peace for you!
Kay

[kblythe]

I am so very very sorry for what you are going through. My m/c occurred at 7 weeks. I had a D&C because I couldn't imagine waiting for it to end on its own. I had to wait until my beta levels were back to zero before I could try again. It takes a while for the hormones to return to zero, so you might be looking at 6-8 weeks. In a way, it's probably good to take time to heal both physically and emotionally.

For me, the only thought that brought me any comfort was the idea that, if something was wrong with the baby, God took the decision away from me about whether to terminate. It turned out that my pregnancy was a partial molar, so it was doomed to fail.

It took a while and a different path for me (embryo donation), but I finally have my bundle of joy. So hold on to the hope and belief that your bundle of joy is still around the corner, waiting for you.

Bless you.

K.

[harpjs]

Wanessa- Don't know if you remember me from the IUI threads or not but I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I found out today that I am having a m/c too. I will go for a D & C like procedure tomorrow morning. : ( What should I expect? When were you told AF would come? Do you have to wait for your betas to fall first? And did you find out how long it would be before you could try again? I was so upset and was crying so much this morning after the US that I didn't know what to say/ask. Again I am so sorry for your loss. Thanks for any replies.

[tomekwa]

Originally Posted by harpjs

Wanessa- Don't know if you remember me from the IUI threads or not but I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I found out today that I am having a m/c too. I will go for a D & C like procedure tomorrow morning. : ( What should I expect? When were you told AF would come? Do you have to wait for your betas to fall first? And did you find out how long it would be before you could try again? I was so upset and was crying so much this morning after the US that I didn't know what to say/ask. Again I am so sorry for your loss. Thanks for any replies.

Hi sweetie, I sent u a Private Message. I'm so sorry that you're having to go through this too.

[tucansam]

Sorry to hear of your loss. We cycled together back in Feb. I lost ours in April. And surprisingly we did another IUI 2 months later.

I think it depends on how far along you are and your DR. My Dr didn't seem to need us to wait.

If you need any advice, just PM.....

Hope you HcG numbers fall quickly so you can try again soon.

[LisaM]

Wanessa: I can only imagine the pain this is causing, after all the procedures and mental readiness of becoming pregnant. I can only say that I am sorry and I hope that your doctors will learn from what happened and come up with a reason and way to avoid it when you are ready to start again.

Harp: Don't know if you recall me from the May thread, but I saw that you had posted here too. My heart breaks for you. Do you have any answers as to what happened? Take the time to take everything in and know you have an angel watching over you now.

[harpjs]

Lisa-I do remember you. My RE did an embryoscopy so we should have results in 3-4 weeks, well, 3-4 weeks from the procedure. I don't know what to think at this point as to what the problem could be. I haven't talked to my RE since the procedure. My follow up appt isn't until after the results come in. Hoping for good news b/c I did email my RE and he said as long as the results come back okay, we can do a FET in Sept.

Wanessa- Thanks so much for the PM. It helped me so much so know more about what was/ is happening. Also, I saw your other post about lactating and that stinks! I don't have any advice but I wanted to say that my boobs are huge. I think they are still getting bigger! Only 2 of my bras fit...a sports bra and a regular one. While DH is pleased with it, I am not! I hope they go down soon. And I hope yours get better 2! Did you call your RE?