[Bothsidesnow]

At our 7 wk, 5 day u/s yesterday, the doctors confirmed that we had lost our little one. There was still no growth since our last appointment 5 days earlier, and the faint, slow heartbeat that was once present was no longer detectable.

We have been given the option of letting things pass naturally (or with the aid of medication) or to have a procedure done in the office, which is supposed to be gentler than the standard D&C. I am leaning towards going the natural route right now, though I know the waiting will be difficult.

However, if we went with the procedure, we would have the option of genetic testing. One doctor suggested that since it is our first miscarriage, she would not necessarily recommend the testing since most likely, it is some chromosomal abnormality that caused the loss. She said that she typically only recommends genetic karyotyping in the case of recurrent miscarriage. Another doctor suggested that we might want to do it anyway, as it could be useful for future reference... and just to know. It is a tough decision, and I do fear the small risk of infection or uterine scarring that could result from the procedure.

We are currently struggling with the decision and would like to ask for advice from others who have also gone through this or something similar. Thank you for any guidance you may be able to offer.

[lovingwife]

I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. My m/c was very similar. We saw a heartbeat. It wasn't as strong as it should have been and then a week later the heart had stopped beating. I opted for the D&C. I wanted to move on as quickly as possible and start the healing process. The surgery wasn't too bad and I don't know how different the recovery was from a natural m/c. My OB did the testing. I didn't even think to ask about it, he just did it. Like your doctor said, it's good to have for future reference. There was no way I could have carried on knowing my baby was still inside me with no heartbeat, it was just too sad. I didn't have any problems with scarring and was able to conceive again naturally after I had endo removed. My heart goes out to you and DH. It is a terrible experience, but you will recover emotionally and physically with time.

[kmp280]

I am so sorry you have to go through this. I know how this feels. I have gone through 5m/c and it does not get any easier.

I lost my first one at 11th week and I was told the exact same thing that since it was our first m/c that they would not recommend genetic testing. Unfortunately for me the subsequent m/c were all at around 7-8 mark and I naturally m/c it over a span of couple of days once the spotting started. So after 10 years of TTC we had no clue if we had chromosomal issues.

As far as choosing between d&C or natural...that is a hard decision. There is a small chance of infection. But this is a rather routine procedure. With the natural m/c the waiting can be bothersome. But it really feels like a heavy period. However it is easier compared to recovering from D&C. They do say D&C helps with implantation in subsequent pregnancies.

If you are opting for D&C..I would surely leverage it to do the genetic testing. It can just be reassuring to know that there is no genetic issues. If there should be issues then there is always work around that. But I wish I did not listen to the advise I was given and had known earlier. With that knowledge I would have opted for IVF/PGD much sooner.
Hope it helps. Good luck with your decision. I hope you will get your BFP soon!!

Originally Posted by Bothsidesnow

At our 7 wk, 5 day u/s yesterday, the doctors confirmed that we had lost our little one. There was still no growth since our last appointment 5 days earlier, and the faint, slow heartbeat that was once present was no longer detectable.

We have been given the option of letting things pass naturally (or with the aid of medication) or to have a procedure done in the office, which is supposed to be gentler than the standard D&C. I am leaning towards going the natural route right now, though I know the waiting will be difficult.

However, if we went with the procedure, we would have the option of genetic testing. One doctor suggested that since it is our first miscarriage, she would not necessarily recommend the testing since most likely, it is some chromosomal abnormality that caused the loss. She said that she typically only recommends genetic karyotyping in the case of recurrent miscarriage. Another doctor suggested that we might want to do it anyway, as it could be useful for future reference... and just to know. It is a tough decision, and I do fear the small risk of infection or uterine scarring that could result from the procedure.

We are currently struggling with the decision and would like to ask for advice from others who have also gone through this or something similar. Thank you for any guidance you may be able to offer.

[Godiva4me]

Bothsides- I am sorry for you loss. If you see my signature, you will see I m/c at 6 1/2 wks. My doctor gave me the same options, but I opted to go naturally because I have a uterine condition that I/we preferred not to mess with, plus I have had several surgeries to remove polyps, fibroids, etc. so my RE thought if I was ok with it, it was best to do a natural m/c. It was not bad at all, and there are several ladies on here that have done natural too. You can search 'natural miscarriage' on the search tab and read more of their stories. I didn't really have that heavy of bleeding, or lets say I expected it to be alot more. It did however take my body forever to get my hcg levels below 5. I have had D&C's for other things, and that isn't a hard procedure either, and very minimal pain following it.

Good luck with whatever you decide. You will make the best decision for yourself! There are also other sites on miscarriages that are helpful. If I can recall the names, I will make a post for you!

The website is: The Misdiagnosed Miscarriage Site go to the waiting to miscarry section for good info, but the whole site is pretty good.

Wishing you all the best!

[Bothsidesnow]

Thank you all so much for sharing your own personal stories with me. It it is such a heartbreaking thing to go through, and I truly appreciate your honest opinions and advice.

I've been struggling with the decision for the past couple of days... As of today, I think we will try to pass things naturally. Mostly, I worry about the small risk of scarring/infection from the procedure... which I fear could affect my chances of getting pregnant again. I know that it is a minimal risk, but I feel that we have so much stacked against us already. If things do not happen naturally within 2-3 weeks (or if I can't mentally handle it anymore), we will opt for the procedure. I was told that if we waited too long, that could result in complications as well.

Thank you again for sharing your experiences with me and for the useful information. It will surely help me get through this painful time. I wish you all the best!

[karenBFP]

Sorry to hear of yourr loss I had d+c with my losses as its possible that you can get infection due to remaining tissues being left over when you miscarray naturally also its very painfull and can take up to 1 week or more and waiting for it to happen is stress full its bad enough being told of your loss but waiting for it to happen is like rubbing egg in your face. With a d+c all remains of the pregnancy are gone you wont get a infection and you wont feel any pain and you can get on with dealing with your loss.

I know they say you can get scarring etc with a d+c but i have had 9 and i have been complete fine with all of mine and i would prefare to have a d+c than go natural i had a d+c 2mths ago with a 8wks gestation pregnancy and had cyto genetics fsh done and it would be helpfull for future reference. None of my losses was down to chromosome genetics so it just shows you that its possible that there could be no reason or a reason other than chromosome defects for your sad loss. They test from the tissue or babys placenta they can find small blood clots etc and could get to the bottom of why you did lose your baby. They do generally do this after your 3rd loss so your
right it is unsual to ask to do this for your 1st.But if your being offered this d+c cyto genetic test then i would go for it hun. Good luck in the future

[Bothsidesnow]

Thank you, KarenBFP, for your advice. I am very sorry for your losses. I am trying to go the natural route, but it has been 9 days since the diagnosis, and I still show no signs of miscarriage. If things don't progress on their own in the next week or so, it was recommended that I either take Misoprostol to medically induce the miscarriage or have the procedure done. I am still agonizing over the decision, since both pose their own risks. I am so afraid of risking my chances of getting pregnant again. This was my first ever pregnancy... I am so afraid that it won't happen again for me.

Thank you for sharing your experiences with me.

[robynanne]

Bear with me... this is my first post in this section.

Just found out htis afternoon that my baby does not have a h/b and I was 7w5d. Baby only measured 5w4d and I have decided to stop the progesterone. I do have a follow up appt. next week with the RE.

It is so hard to describe how I feel right now. After 11 iui's, 1 IVF, amd 1 FEt, I finally get my only to have this happen.

[Bothsidesnow]

Robynanne - I am very sorry that this is happening to you also. Please know that you are not alone and that my heart goes out to you.

[robynanne]

Thank you and I am very sorry about your loss too.

I go to the RE on Thursday and hopefully things will have progressed by then.