[abouttostoptrying]

This is new for me, but I though that maybe listening to other women's stories might help me deal with this. I'm only 22 and already have had 4 miscarriages. My first two were an incompetent cervix at or around 22 weeks. Both of them were beatiful baby boys. My last two were bighted ovum at or between 6 and 8 weeks. I've had the chromosomes testing with no results. I had a D&C just a month ago for the last baby and I almost died from the blood loss. I'm completely lost, doctors have told me to keep trying, that I have "plenty of time" to have children. I can't help but feel angry, the fact that I have "Plenty of time" should not discredit the loss of 4 beautiful children. My husband an I are at a loss and a looking for advise anywhere we can get it. I'm afraid that I can't continue trying.

[30somethingmom]

I am so sorry to hear about your losses. I've had 2 miscarriages, so I understand the pain you feel. I must admit that 2 losses was enough for me and I cannot imagine having four! Losing a baby is the worst kind of pain imaginable. Please know that you are not alone and that you can come here anytime for support and advice.

There are so many reasons why you could be miscarrying, and if you do want to try again, I would definitely get tested for as many things as possible. The fact that you have had 4 miscarriges definitely indicates there is a problem. Unless it is found and corrected, you may very well miscarry again. In my case, I tested positive for anticardiolipin antibodies and the lupus anticoagulant. Both can cause clotting problems and recurrent miscarriages.

Has your doctor done any testing other than the chromosome analysis? Have you seen or considered seeing a fertility specialist?

Hugs and best of luck to you!

[hopefulx2]

I am so sorry to read about those babies that you lost. Having 4 m/c would drive most people to feel hopeless, but it may be time to change doc to find out whats causing you to keep losing babies. Sometimes it's best to take a breather to allow your body and mind to recuperate so that you're strong enough to take the next step. Good luck in whatever you decide to do.

[meremere]

I am so sorry for your losses, I too have had 4 losses. I only know one was a girl my beautiful Hailey. I can tell you that the deciscion to continue is the hardest you can make. I understand the frustration of your OBGYN telling you to try again, I want to grab my obgyn's neck and squeeze when he told me to try again. But he also cried with me on my last loss just in April and he kicked a hole in his wall when I lost my daughter. I am 14 years older then you and am told I am not to old to keep trying and that makes me MAD. But I am trying again. I too have had the chromazomal tests and last week hd a HSG. I start next week with a RE. I am not thrilled about it but know that all the tests show that nothing is wrong and I want a child badly. BUT DH and I are also persuing adoption.
A good Dr is hard to find and if you are like me I love my OB and felt like I was cheating on him going to someone else for a second opinion, but when the second Dr came back with all the same things I felt better. Try a fertility specialist if you can. I know the emotion can be very hard, I also suggest theropy of some sort. I am doing that now and I am a better person, I thought I was worthless for not giving my DH a child of his own and the theropy is helping me understand I am worth a lot and I have a lot to give.
I only hope the best for you!!! The best of luck and keep the faith!

[brcannady]

Four? Wow, I can't imagine. Of course, for me, when I think of losing another in my mind it's at 38 weeks again. I was so close to holding her, and I have to do it all again!

I'm terrified after just one loss. I don't blame you for wanting to stop after four. But one thing I've learned from the several forums I've been on is that you have to be aggressive for yourself if you want to find answers sometimes. Take charge and demand that they look for everything that they can think of.

Unfortunately, that almost makes the pain worse sometimes, when all you want is for the world to just go away.