[sunny72]

Hi, well back from my hysteroscopy. There was no sono involved, so it was just a solution squirted up there and an incredibly long telescopy device which showed us what it looked like in there. I thought it looked terrible and was expecting then to say so, but the doctor said everything looks great! I said "really??, I'll take your word for it". It was a bit of a Discovery Channel experience. Nothing mentioned about my lining? Maybe I should have asked, but I was shy because it wasn't my RE. I had already embarrased myself by accidently locking the door behind me when I was getting my clothes off and I had to therefore waddle my way to the door half naked with nothing but a long paper towel to cover me in order to let the doctor in.

Now I have a bit of discomfort and light bleeding (story of my life). Hope they did't perferate anything.

Alana, how did they test your lining? visually or via ultrasound??? I'm hoping they check that out thoroughly with me before we really get into it. It would be disappointing to get into the next cycle and have them tell me anything like that. Although they have already billed me for $2K for the FET. They don't mess around to they when it comes to $$$$$$$.

Alana, I think in our household we would of made your nickname Lanie or La la (nothing that you would have liked). I really like Ava. That was my first pick, but hubby convinced me about Stella. I liked Isabella because I like the name Izzy (before Grey's anatomy). Funny enough when Stella was born she got called peachy or little peach more than her name. We chose Stella because we didn't know of any personally and kind of liked it that way -- just old ladies but that's okay. Then we were down at the park one day and we met a little girl named Stella Rose (the same as my Stella) and if we stay in this area they'll be in the same year at school. Grrrr. Not a big deal, but the other mother was PO'd. Ha ha. I should have said mine will be the pretty smart one. No I would never, just incase she's not. Just kidding. Of course MIL had to give us a "Stella got her groove back" book as a baby present which I thouht was strange. Whatever.

I changed my mind, I'm more of a NBB without a padded bra.

[designdiva32]

Originally Posted by sunny72

I should have said mine will be the pretty smart one. No I would never, just incase she's not. Just kidding.

LOL!! Your post had me laughing so hard Heidi. First the naked bottom waddle, now this! The fact is you could say that about your little one. She is gorgeous and I'm sure shes a total smarty pants, in fact, I'd like to be there when you do say that to the other Mum! Thats great news about the procedure results also, now you know you can do the FET when you want. As for the lining, my RE checks it by ultrasound, I never have a clue what he's looking at but thankfully he seems to. At the moment mine is only 3mm, which is terrible. So I'm waiting to see what its like tomorrow morning before I throw in the towel for this cycle completely.

Shelly.... for AF showing. Yay...now you're getting back on the horse too! Now we just need to send her over to Shawna and Grits and hopefully we can all be TTCing by the end of the month. Oh, and your little Morgan is absolutely adorable and I think I do like this name much more than I did. Maybe I will combine mine with DH's. Morgan Isabella or something. That could work too.

Jen, your boss sounds like a pain in the rump! Thankfully mine is never around much, however its also pointless for me as I don't have internet access there anyway! So being at home today has been great. Also, AF acted really weird for me too. She never really came that heavy, until of course the ultrasound, but even then I didn't have the usual PMS symptoms. I guess the miscarriages must have done something to our cycles....I hope its not long term though. Its a little disconcerting!

Shawna, I'm always wondering what Jen is up to at her job also. Can't you just see her in some lab in Colorado...big specs on...lab coat...whipping up some crazy bacteria concoction like a gorgeous red-headed Einstein or something? Very cool job!

[sunny72]

So I'm wondering then if I should request an ultrasound before officially starting the FET cycle. I would of thought they'd do that anyways because the lining is so important, but maybe they want to officially rope me in before they start finding things that would make me postpone?? My little paranoid mind is working overtime.

[Angelwithhope]

Lol Alana- I can totally see our little Einstein at work! I love it! I wanna play with bacteria too...ha ha...but only with gloves and in a lab of course.

Anyone can send AF my way, but she's not needed here. We'll still be on break next spring I'm afraid. I don't know when this is going to stop. (the break )

[jencat215]

Heidi-I am so glad things went well today . I would definitely ask your RE if they do a u/s before the FET. I can't imagine they won't; I agree that the lining is an important factor. Do they put you on meds to cycle for the FET?

Shelly- congrats on AF!!! I am very crampy right now and more blood!!! So tomorrow AM I will call the nurse and tell her that CD3 is Friday and I want in!!!

Shawna and Alana-if ever you want to come see my work, come to Colorado! Trust me, it isn't that exciting. Well, sometimes it can be fun. I don't wear a space suit, but we do have BSL 2-3 labs. BSL is biosafety level...there are 4. BSL4 is where they work with agents that have no cure and no vaccine and are highly transmittable, such as Ebola (yuck!). BSL 3 is stuff that there is either a vaccine for (yellow fever for example), or is very dangerous but not easily transmitted (you have to eat it, like some bacteria, but it is not airborne). HIV for example, is BSL 2. The stuff we work with is BSL 2 or possibly BSL 3. We make Flu virus, which the strains we use are BSL 2, but strains like the deadly one from 1918 are BSL 3 and depending on the quantities you make I think it can qualify you for BSL 3. Some of the bacteria strains we produce make horribly nasty toxins that can be deadly in large quantities. I think low quantites are BSL 2, higher are BSL 3. There are federal rules on how much toxin you can possess at one time. Most of the stuff I work on is 'recombinant' proteins, which means proteins cloned into a non-harmful strain of E. coli (you could eat the E. coli...stuff that lives symbiotically in your stomach!), and most of the proteins/toxins I make are only partial proteins/toxins, so they are not infective. But I do get to work with the fun (dangerous) stuff sometimes. Oh, and for our BioSuites, all we have to do is wear a disposable gown (over our clothes), eye protection (if you wear glasses, you can 'get by' with that...I don't, but my boss does), and gloves. No space suits... My hands are always dry cause I wash them so often. But when I am working, rocking to my iPod (always on shuffle, but I have so much Howard Jones on it that I get to hear him often ) I am in my own little Jen world...

OMG, sorry I am rambling about this!!! Here I go boring you all again.

Any word from Grits lately?

[sunny72]

Jen, no meds beforehand, but from CD1 I'll be on incremental doses of Estrace and after the transfer I'd be on PIO again.

Your job sounds scary but fun. I'd be afraid I was too much of a muddle head and create a monster somehow. I know it's different to what you do, but whenever you talk about it, it reminds me of a situation in Boston where they are wanting to create a federal facility to study dangerous pathogens-- a 'BioSafety' Laboratory. Residents are fighting it because they think it is a health risk. Is that a specialized field or something you and DH could do it you wanted to relocate to Boston, he he.

[jencat215]

DH is less excited about the dangerous pathogens than I am. We are both protein chemists, although we both wear many hats such as biochemist, molecular biologist, and me virologist and microbiologist. So, yes, we both could work in that type of environment. And believe me, the thought is there...

Oh, we got a shipment from Legal Seafoods today!!! At the conference the first 30 people to visit one of the vendors got a coupon for $30 of chowda/stuff from Legal Seafood. I meant to bring it to you girls (Heidi and Shelly) cause I thought it meant you had to go there. But I forgot about it. Then, when I was unpacking my stuff I came across the coupon and it said that it was something you go on line and pick out, then they mail it to you! So DH and I just had our clam chowda dinner! It also came with a lemon and crab cakes, but we found the package this AM behind our milk box. I know it was shipped yesterday (got an email yesterday) but it must of arrived yesterday. We couldn't see it cause the milk box hid it. I can't believe it came to our house before 7am... Anyway, the chowder was nice and cold, but the crab cakes weren't, so we didn't want to take any chances. But the chowda was great!!!

Oh, I have a question about tampons. So, during my first IUI cycle I had a pap exam before the IUI and I spotted and I spotted with the IUI. Both times my Drs said not to use tampons. I know that was during the cycle and that of course you don't want to once inseminated, but the pap was before the IUI. Anyway, my question (about time!) is can you use them? Tomorrow is supposed to be beautifully sunny and 94 so I want to go into the pool at the gym. What do you think?

[designdiva32]

Jen, I still think your job sounds kinda '007' compared to what I do all day. The bio levels sound a bit scary though...but I guess my main concern would be whether you test on animals or not. I've read some horror stories about lab animals being tortured etc. Do they have monkeys etc at your lab? If so, can I come rescue them? I could handle a monkey as a pet I think....maybe my dogs would disagree, lol.

But back to fertility stuff, the tampon issue is confusing to me too. However I'll admit I always use them unless specifically told not to by the medical profession, so if I were you I'd go ahead and use them and enjoy the hot day. Its when you have a risk of infection to or through the cervix I think that they can be a problem. Like after my LEEP procedure...tampons were a big NO NO!

Shawna, I'm sorry you are still having to take a break. Although maybe its also for the best. Here I am rushing into TTC again and my lining/hormones aren't co-operating at all! When you do get back into it again everything will probably just slide into place and you'll have your healthy BFP in no time.

Heidi, I'm kinda suspicious of the fertility clinics in regards to money too. Lets be honest, they're not in it for the fun are they?! So definately get checked out before starting your FET cycles as going from how my RE reacted to my lining, a thin one is not a good thing. I'm guessing the new little embryo can't stick so good or something. Which is what I spoke to my DH tonight about, and we both agreed we'd rather wait out this cycle if my lining is still thin, than have to go through another miscarriage and have to wait the two to three months it takes to recover from that. (and that doesn't include the emotional recovery!). Either way, I'd definately make them check this before you move into your FET cycle.

Oh and Jen...I'm wondering too....where is Grits? Are you there hun? Please let us know how you are doing because we are worried!

[Angelwithhope]

Good Evening ladies!!

Woo! Infertility is a hell of a ride! Dh and I fought so bad this afternoon and every where we turned I swear it was going to end. (I guess that's what happens when you have two head strong, stubborn German peeps duking it out! Not good! I was ready to send DH back to Germany! LOL) Anyways, we've worked it out and of course the whole fight started about his dad. (Who is an even WORSE head strong stubborn jerk of a dad German. I swear sometimes we're worse then the Irish, which also flows through my blood...so I dunno...we're just all really stubborn! Which = not good!) We had it out good but I think we're doing better now. It was one of those fights that you just have to get out of the way, kwim? DH won't give me a definate on how long we will sit out TTC. I hate it, I need a time frame! We'll get there though.

Jen- NO SPACE SUIT? Awww! I could have so much fun in one of those I tell you!! I think I'd even borrow one to scare the poop out of my brother and his wife. (They have this thing with aliens! LOL) That would be too comical! Otherwise, your work sounds very interesting. I'd still like to come to work with you for a day!!

Heidi- Good news on the appt. It's always great to hear good news and I have to laugh about the locking the door story. I'm sure it happens to a lot of ladies!

Alana- I think you're on the right track. Although you desperately want to be PG agian, there is no sense in chancing things if things aren't up to par! I will continue to keep my fingers crossed for the right lining for you though!

[sunny72]

Shawna, IF can be a real strain on the marriage that's for sure. If people (inlaws) knew everything that DH and I have been through, they would be handing us awards or at least patting us on the backs. I really suffered emotionally while TTC#1 and it took a toll on our marriage. Then the year after DD was born we really had to deal with my DH's alcoholism. He got himself sober all by himself (foolishly but successfully). He was hospitalized twice because of his addiction before he was 30. Somehow we've managed to stick by each other admist after all the hard stuff. The latest m/c has been very hard on us both but after the other stuff, it just seems like life is not going to be a breeze for us, so we just march on. The financial strain is something we haven't had to deal with so much. No more than $5K so far, but I can imagine having to fund everything would be so hard to deal with. Financial strain alone is stressful, but on top of IF it really puts you in a crazy situation. Talk about balls of stress.

You had said you were waiting it out until next Spring -- is that for financial reasons?

As for how I feel right now. I almost feel like I am racing things along too fast. I'm wondering if it's too soon to try another procedure, but I'll have to try and trust the medical professionals in that they wouldn't put me through anything if my body wasn't ready?

[Angelwithhope]

I was more joking about the waiting until next spring. It just seems like that's what's going to happen.

IF has been hell on our relationship, it has made it so much stronger but they are days where I would swear up and down that its going to ruin everything we've worked so hard for!!

We're waiting until DH hears back from the Police Services he has applied to. He isn't a cop...yet. We're hoping that comes sometime this fall!! He has a thousand bazillions (I sound like my neice! LOL) of tests to either run (physically) or write, and tons of interviews to do. We had to shell out $500 for a suit cause he has lost the 37 lbs.

Then DH tells me today (which I thought was not possible) that we have the money for IVF or raising a child, but not both! So we have to wait until he has a serious job again. He's currently working security at Concerts and rodeos...those kinds of events.

I think he knows too that emotionally, I'm not ready. Three years, two miscarriages and life in the city we live in, is taking it's toll on me. So he says, no he won't have a baby with me right now. I have to respect his decision don't I? No poking holes in the condoms right? lol. I guess I just have to be okay with this for now. Honestly, once we hit October which is the three year mark and my 25th birthday, I'll be pushing to get back on track!

Sometimes I can't believe we've been trying since before we were married and since we were both just 22. (DH was even 21 now that i think about it!) Sometimes I feel like his old useless wife, who can't get pregnant, then who can't STAY pregnant! *Sigh* IF is rough, but you all know that!

[jencat215]

quick reply- I gotta go get some dessert cause a. I am crampy and itching for some, and b. cause DH is trying to pull me off the computer to get dessert!

No, I don't use animals. Never, ever. Not interested. My company doesn't even have an animal facility, so no worries there. We do have an occasional mouse or rat (traps everywhere), but those are intruders and luckily I have never seen them, just heard tale of them.

Also, I see Grits lurking, so hopefully there will be a report when I get back from getting dessert (I think cake is in order). I hurt so bad (cramps) but I am going to milk it for what it is worth and go eat something bad!!!

[GRITS]

Hey Girls! Boy you guys have been busy. I have been reading like crazy trying to catch up! My Internet was barely functioning due to the smoke from fires. I have weird wireless due to living in 'BFE'. So if there is heavy winds , or lots of thick smoke, I am out. The smoke has been terrible. I am down in a little valley between two MT ranges, so it gets trapped here. Anyway.......I am here. And I have still been praying for you all.
Shelly congrats on AF!!
I am still waiting..........
Jen we have a BSL4 about 10 miles from me. My sister lives about three blocks from it! Love the Howard jones pics! Still do not remember him, but oh well.....It is fun too watch you love him! I hope the dessert helps your cramps.
I really do not have much to report. H=Just waiting for AF as far as that stuff goes. I too bleed after sex frequently as someone mentioned. My OBG did not seem concerned. It had not even occured to me when AF shows I could not use tampons........should I ?

I have been busy lately helping my DH care for a 93 year old neighbor who's caregiver just walked out, and she has no family. It has been a enlightning experience for the whole family this week. None of us have ever done anything of the sort.

[JustPeachy]

Shawna - I am so sorry for your tough day with DH. I have a feeling all of our marriages have become emotional roller coasters. When I met my DH, I was healthy as can be! A few months into our relationship I started having these weird abdominal pains. Well, fast forward 3.5 years and I've had 4 surgeries for endo, found out he has his own male factor issues, and now the IVF dramas and financial strains. I know each of us has been through more than we could possibly imagine in our short lives and marriages. It makes me sad too sometimes. These "newlywed" years are supposed to be carefree and fun with just tons of traveling and good old fashioned bd'ing! But, I know all of these struggles will make us the most amazing parents with great bonds to raise our children. Or, that's my mantra on the tough days when I'm stressed and the medical bills are piling up

JenCat - I am amazed and fascinated with your job. Can I come play one day?? Chemistry was my favorite class in high school but I wasn't into blood so no med school. Can we relocate you to the CDC near me?

Sunny - Keep a close eye on that RE. I think they have the best intentions but I can't imagine trying to keep track of all those patients and all the variables in these protocols.

Alana - I'm hoping that lining gets nice and thick real soon over there. Isabella Morgan sounds adorable to me!!

Welcome back Grits! Just saw you posted.