[Shellyhume]

Oh, Alana (and Ronni)... no one should ever look at a person's age in this battle... if you ever feel badly about your "AMA", it could be worse... you could have people give you dirty looks when you tell them you're 23 and have been in fertility treatments for two years, and TTC for three... you could even get the incredibly condescending "You have plenty of time, why are you trying to rush this?" (my eye twitches a little bit when that happens... and I change the subject because i don't have an answer.). Bottom line... if a woman wants to get pregnant, who the hell's business is it how old they are?!

[Angelwithhope]

Originally Posted by Shellyhume

Oh, Alana (and Ronni)... no one should ever look at a person's age in this battle... if you ever feel badly about your "AMA", it could be worse... you could have people give you dirty looks when you tell them you're 23 and have been in fertility treatments for two years, and TTC for three... you could even get the incredibly condescending "You have plenty of time, why are you trying to rush this?" (my eye twitches a little bit when that happens... and I change the subject because i don't have an answer.). Bottom line... if a woman wants to get pregnant, who the hell's business is it how old they are?!

I get teh same looks Hun!! We started TTC when we were 22...have been at it almost three years. Infact my GP today told me, "good luck getting pregnant, you've done it twice, it will happen soon again!" I wanted to smack her! And I believe the girl in the exam room before me was 15 and PREGNANT!!! Grrr! Anyways, I get a lot of dirty looks because DH and I started trying even before we were married! But we knew we had fertility issues and well, anyone who hasn't gone through it, just doesn't understand I'm afraid!

Oh btw, is anyone elses fertility forum screwy?? I think I need to clear my cache or something, but this is annoying and always happens with this site!

[hopeful2bmom]

If anyone wants to cry hysterically, watch this video. I had heard the song before but not seent the video. I ended up getting the computer wet as I sobbed. I am a gluten for punishment...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JqfGqOx2iDQ

[Shellyhume]

susan, you're not a glutton for punishment... you're a woman who knows what this is like and is comforted in knowing that you are not alone... and that it's not just you.

I actually have this video on my myspace... along with the song that automatically starts to play when you open my page... and the main line in the song is my headline... I wanna know what it's like to bring a dream to life...

Though I've seen the video a hundred times, I always get choked up when I see the "5 miscarriages", "About to tell my husband that I'm pregnant", and "We just heard our baby's heartbeat"... oh, that last one gets me just writing it... *sigh* Never got to hear my two angel babies' heartbeats...

[hopeful2bmom]

Shelly-
I just went to your myspace page. What a beautiful page you have. I love what you have written. You really know how to turn words into emotions. You have such a positive attitude. I could learn a lot from you!
Thanks for understanding. Today I feel lonely, missing all of my would have been babies. Everytime we had embryos transfered and I either did not become pregnant, had a chemical pregnancy or had a miscarriage, they all felt like huge losses to me. I grieved everyone of them. Even the embies that never survived past day two in the lab. Those were all my babies. I am so emotional today. I don't kno what my problem is. I feel like DH is so distant lately too. Maybe I am just hormonal and paranoid. I just finished AF last week, so I should be feeling great right about now. This should be my ovulation week, if I still ovulate with POF.
Ugggghhh.. I am sorry for the ramble here girls. Just feeling lonely, useless and out of sorts. I don't work. I am a stay at home wannabe mom and student, so when I am not in school I have too much time to think. When in fact I should be thinking about what to write my thesis on... Procrastination... hmmpfff.

[sunny72]

Happy Birthday Alana. Don't worry about the age innuendos by the doctor. Just remember, you'll always be two years younger than me!!!!!

My first RE visit was when I was 27. I got the whole "I'm sure everything will be fine" comments and they didn't even take a good look at things at that stage. I really wish they had.

Also, and this is a bit of a taboo subject in our house, but every SA test DH ever did, the male RE's all said it was sufficient. All but one who said with both our dx that we had a 2-5% chance of conceiving. I think he really wanted our business because we were self paying back then too!! Good news is miraculously we did eventually. However, when I finally got my female doctor to do a SA this time around, she sent us straight to a male factor specialist. (DH can't stand her) I wonder whether we had years of not being taken seriously on both ends of the spectrum whether we would have had better odds sooner!! Whatever, moving forward and doing that best we can with what we have: 8% normal little guys and two stumpy tubes.

Shelly, I knew you weren't offended. I could tell that you were probably the type that enjoys a little banter and sharing of ideas. Nothing too confrontational like me.

Jen, glad your bracelet arrived. And just in time to help Gertie Monet Juluis along.

[JustPeachy]

Alana - Happy Happy Birthday!! And don't think about the years. Think about all those hollywood actresses getting pregnant in their 40s! No one telling them they're too old.

Shelly - Boy do I wish I was in Boston! My SIL got a freebie IVF in Mass literally 30 days before moving to Georgia. Very tempting except I finally got rid of my cold winters... of course it was 104 (!!) today down here. Maybe I will trade you. And, glad we didn't scare you off yesterday.

Jen - I know my clinic is the largest in Georgia and is usually running about 4 or 5 studies at a time. So, I think there is always an option. You don't get to make as many choices about your treatments (increasing meds, days for ET) but it is completely free....

Shawna - the forum has been behaving for me today but it definitely has days when I can't get on at all or does weird things on the creen.

Susan - I hope we can cheer you up a little over here tonight. Those days happen to everyone. I know I'm having one of those irritated with stupid people days today. Please don't feel useless. You are just in an in-between phase and those are always hard to cope with. My career in Real Estate is always very up and down so I go through those weeks too. Plus, that video gets to me everytime!

Heidi - I always found the male doctors the same way with my DH until this latest male RE. My male Gyn had me do two rounds of (can't think of the name) where you have s*x and then go straight to the gyn to see if they can find any spermies under the microscope. After not finding any (and accusing me of cleaning too well), we went through 2 rounds of SA before being referred to the RE and a urologist. Oh, and the male urologist whom ignored my questions told DH that we could continue to try naturally and would have a 25% chance of conceiving if we had timed bd'ing for the next FOUR years. I almost busted out laughing! Was that comment just for the male ego??

Ronni - I think maternal fits you very well and bodes only good things! I only wish I had you closer to me for those great instincts!

Grits - Always love having you here! I hope the neighbor is doing ok.

I had a frustrating day today but it is almost over. I am in countdown mode with this particular buyer of mine. Thankfully, the loan closes (I hope) on Monday and then I really hope this girl loses my number!! She doesn't listen to a thing that I say and then gets all aggravated when she hires other lenders, insurance agents, etc. and they screw things up. Yuck!! I've tried emailing her checklists and nothing works with this one. I spoke to her last night to gently "remind" her what she needed to be doing and her response was "Oh, f*ck closing is this Monday??". Yes sweetie. That's exactly why I've been calling you daily. Usually, my first time homebuyers are so excited to get into their first house that they're counting the hours!

OK, that's it for my venting for the night. I promise. I've already pacified myself with a chocolate ice cream sandwich I think it's just the heat getting to me.

[sunny72]

I'll never forget the day he told me we had a 2 to 5% chance. I was like no wonder this has been taking forever. The day I turned up for my 2nd IUI I was told that there were no sperm in the sample, nothing, zero, nada. The sperm technician or whatever she was told me to go home and BD if possible - and I was thinking, what the heck for???? Needless to say, I don't recall that happening. We were feeling so blue. And poor!! We had sunk a grand into a cycle that didn't work out. Turns out it was because DH had been very sick and had a fever the month before. It's amazing how that stuff works. Anyway, ramble, ramble.

Alana, are you doing anything nice for your B'Day? A nice bubbling sparkling grape juice or two?

Susan, sorry you are feeling down. I haven't seen the video because I have dial-up. zzzzzzz takes forever.

Grits, you are such a great person for helping your elderly friend.

[hopeful2bmom]

Rachel-

The lovely post- coital exam I believe is the name of that test! I used to work for an OB when I was younger and I remember having to book patients for those and wondering to myself, "Why the heck are they having that done?" Did I think I would find myself o the other end years later???

I just ate a very unsatisfying chocolate chip cookie. It was one of those Dove ones dipped in chocolate, but it had no taste. Now I need something else to keep me company while I watch reruns of Law and Order SVU.

[Shellyhume]

Oh goodness... anybody else avoiding their PCPs (Primary Care Physician) like the plague for any non-fertility-related thing?! DH and I just got in a tiff about my hating my doctor for three years and never getting up the gall to find a new one... me with a perpetual yeastie... but how do you find a new doctor. I have one close friend who adores her PCP but last I checked she wasn't taking new patients. Ugh. I know I need to find a new one but how do you know the good ones from the ones who treat you like they are so sick of hearing people complain about everything. Everytime I call my PCPs office, I get her stuffy secretary, whom I almost told off one time... but I'm nonconfrontational. She answered the phone huffy and made the appointment seemingly reluctantly (like, okay, fine, you can see the doctor.) and when I got there, she acted like "okay, what do you want?" I almost reached through that stupid slidy window thing and throttled her. When I go to the doctor, it's for a **** good reason... it's not like I don't get poked and prodded enough... ugh.

NO MORE DOCTORS!!!

[hopeful2bmom]

Shelly,
I love my doctors here in providece. I could recommend an OB/GYN down here in Pawtucket/Providence area. I know you work around here(right?) Maybe you could plan appointments around your luch break?

[sunny72]

Post-coital, that's the one thing I never had to do?? coital.... now that is just a weird word isn't it.

[Shellyhume]

Originally Posted by hopeful2bmom

Shelly,
I love my doctors here in providece. I could recommend an OB/GYN down here in Pawtucket/Providence area. I know you work around here(right?) Maybe you could plan appointments around your luch break?

I used to work in Waltham... but have since quit. I'm doing most of my work in Worcester now... probably going to try to find someone either where I live now or in Worcester. Thanks though! DH mentioned he thought I should find an OBGYN instead of a family practitioner... what's the difference?

[sunny72]

Yes, I think you need an ob-gyn too. I have a PCP and also a "down-there specialist". My PCP is nice enough but about my age so I find it a little off-putting. I believe she's had IF issues herself and last time I was sobbing about being depressed, she teared up herself. There I was in a johnny with black socks and bulging red eyes with boogies coming out of my nose and a teary doctor. I don't plan on going back there in a hurry. I had to get a referrel from her for the RE and I was standing in her office and the "referral lady" asked out loud what the referral was for, so I just walked out. I wasn't going to let the whole waiting room know my business. Grrr.

My ob-gyn is the one DH doesn't like and suggested the male factor RE.

[hopeful2bmom]

Well the OB/GYN's are the ones that woud follow your pregnancies and deliver your children. A family/general practioner or internist is the one who would follow you general health and any issues that may arise with it. You would have your physicals and see your GP for sick visits. You can also use your OB'Gyn as your primary care physician. I just think OB/GYNs are more sensitive to "womens' issues especially chronic yeast or vaginitis.

GP's are generally less patient because they are inundated with sick visits all day long...