[Frank23]

Well, I don’t know if guys post here, but one does now. They found no heartbeat on my wife’s ultrasound today. She will be 8 weeks on Thursday. The fetus/baby was also a week too young in size. They are having her go back next week in case they missed the heart beat. I’ve never read more conflicting information on heart beat and age of the baby. Some say by 7 weeks or it’s a goner, some say 10, 12. Its also possible that the fetus is a week younger then they thought.

I’m confused.

Like a royal jack ***, I told everyone with ears about our first pregnancy.

I’m so **** sad. Actually angry at the universe. I know there are people dealing with a lot worse things in their lives, but I could barely stop from weeping when my wife told me on the phone at work (I stupidly told her to call me with what I assumed was good news)

Should I even retain hope that it still has a chance, that they missed the heartbeat? Or should I just chalk it up as doomed.

I think I maybe taking this harder then my even wife, but don’t want her to see it so that it makes it worse for her.

[sharonla]

Oh, I am so sorry to hear your news. And, you are not the only guy on this forum. I believe that you have to stay positive. Things can turn around. I have heard several stories of going back and the heartbeat is there. Dont give up! May God be with you in this time of need. Keep us posted.

[frymomma2b]

I know they can sometimes see the heartbeat at 6 weeks and should at 7 weeks but i dont know about in your specific case. maybe you should fast in prayer until then. It is such a hard thing to deal with and i have been through two misscarriages in 7 months so i deff know how you feel. We told everyone with ears both times. It is not time to recant your joyous news until the doctor tells you. I wouldnt tell anyone that she has lost it till she has and even then just tell family and the friends when they ask. I found that easier then going up to or calling everyone. Just when they ask let them know whats goind on. Mostly they just want to be encouraging and supportive so dont think they are going to judge the situation or think anything but sympothy about it. I hope everything turns out ok. I will keep yall in my prayers.

[kblythe]

I'm so sorry, but I agree that it's a bit too early to give up all hope. If you conceived naturally, there is a chance that you are just off on the dates. And at this early in the game, a week can make a huge difference in terms of what the u/s can pick up.

If it's a worst-case scenario, I'll tell you what my doctor told me when I had a miscarriage: humans are just inefficient reproducers. It's a great sign that your wife was able to get pregnant, and it bodes well for her future ability to conceive successfully.

As for me, on some level I was grateful that, if something were tremendously wrong with the fetus, God made the decision to end the pregnancy so I wouldn't have to be faced with that difficult decision.

Having said all of that, it's normal to grieve. So take your time. And even though you are a guy, you will always find sympathy and even empathy here.

Kathryn.

[jana]

Frank, I'm so sorry that you are going through this. There are so many women and husbands here who have gone through something similar. I am a believer in never giving up hope until all hope is lost. I'm sure your wife is hurting just as you are, but is also trying to be strong for you as well. You both are in my prayers and thoughts.