[Sarah_84]

Hi Regina, I'm sorry you're feeling burnt out. I'm right there with you! I'm not giving up though. I was feeling really bad before I got my BFP so that could be a good sign for you! . They found out that I have endometriosis from the surgury when they removed my tube but they didn't tell me till yesterday. They thought I already knew about it. I'll be praying that AF stays away for you! Take care. xoxoxo

[babyplease]

Hi Sara, You sound really good. I'm glad that you are speaking positive now . I needed to hear another positive person because even though I know that things will come out okay in the end, I stillget a little down sometimes. It doesn't help that every time I turn on the TV they are talking about who's pregnant and showing their baby bumps!! Who Cares?!! I am so tired of that!! I'm also a little upset with my DH because I feel that he is not giving 100% right now. I know that he is frustrated and burnt out also but you still have to give 100%. He hasn't done anything specific but I feel like I have to tell him when to now. That's really not good because it REALLY feels like a chore now. Then If I get home from work late ( which happens sometimes) he's tired and can seem like he doesn't want to which makes me not want to. Who wants to with someone who doesn't seem into it? He doesn't realize that I just worked a 12 hour day and I am tired too but I am still determined!! It's not like I bug him every week. Only the week that I'm ovulating. I work every day and come home and cook his dinner every night. I also do all the cleaning, laundry ect. I feel like the least he can do is give 100% to be while ttc!! I know that I'm just upset because this is getting to me but I can't help feeling this way. I know he loves me dearly and doesn't mean to hurt my feelings but he does. I know I should probably talk to him about it but I'm waiting until I can communicate without getting mad or upset. It's been a little over a week since I've wanted to say something and I think I am calmer now so maybe I will talk to him this weekend. Any advice? I'm sorry to be venting to you because I know you are going through a lot right now but I know I can talk to you and you've helped me before. Anyway, I'm still cramping a little like AF is coming soon so we will see. I will probably get it because like I said already I don't think we enough to have a big chance. Oh well, back to the drawing board right? It will happen someday! I hope all is well and as always I am sending you big Hugs and Kisses!! I hope you stay positive and can start trying again real soon. Are they going to take care of endom. soon so you can try? Talk to you soon, Regina

[Mom2MandyandTristan]

Hey my ladies
Sorry I have been MIA! We are moving tomorrow to our new house (yay) so this week we have been painting, cleaning, and packing and more packing (yuck).
Oh Sarah I am sooooo soooo soooo sorry to hear about the endo. When is your appt with the gyn?? I pray this is NOT another obsticle and the gyn tells you, you can keep trying.
Regina, ANY advice and/or recommendations you want to give me I promise I will follow and I am sorry AF might rear her ugly head but she's not here yet so I'm still keeping my fingers and toes crossed for ya.
I have to say I feel bad for being on this forum at times seeing as I have 2 kids and the 2 of you who deserve it more than anything are struggling. The stregth and determination I see from the 2 of you is so amazing I know you both are going to make awesome moms (and soon)!!!!
Oh I read this some where and I soon as I saw it I knew I need to post it to you ladies:
What God meant when He gave me infertility

Couples experiencing infertility often receive well-meaning but extremely insensitive “advice”. We can list all the most popular ones: “Just relax and you’ll get pregnant”, or “adopt and you’ll get pregnant,” of the most painful from those who think they’ve got the goods on God’s plan, “Maybe God never meant for you to have children.” The sheer audacity of making a statement like that never fails to amaze me.

These same people would never walk up to someone seeking treatment for cancer and say “Maybe God never meant for you to live.” However, because I am infertile, I’m supposed to get on with my life. It’s hard to understand that people cannot see infertility for what it is, a disease for which I have to seek treatment. What if Jonas Salk had said to the parents of polio victims, “Maybe God meant for thousands of our children to be cripples, live in an iron lung, or die.” What if he’d never tried to find a cure? Who could think for one minute that was God’s plan?

What do I think God meant when he gave me infertility?

I think he meant for my husband and I to grow closer, become stronger, love deeper. I think God meant for us to find the fortitude within ourselves to get up every time infertility knocks us down. I think God meant for our medical community to discover medicines, invent medical equipment, and create procedures and protocols. I think God meant for us to find a cure for infertility.

No, God never meant for me not to have children. That’s not my destiny; that’s just a fork in the road I’m on. I’ve been placed on the road less traveled and given more compassion, deeper courage, and greater inner strength on this journey to resolution, and I haven’t let him down.

Frankly, if the truth be known, I think God has singled me out for a special treatment. I think God meant for me to build a thirst for a child so strong and so deep that when that baby is finally placed in my arms, it will be the longest, coolest, most refreshing drink I’ve ever known.

While I would never have chosen infertility, I cannot deny that a fertile woman could never know the joy that awaits me. Yes, one way or another, I will have a baby of my own.

…And the next time someone wants to offer me unsolicited advice I’ll say, “ Don’t tell me what God meant when he handed me infertility. I already know.”

[Sarah_84]

Regina, Don't feel bad about venting, thats what I'm here for! I'm sorry you're having a hard time with DH at the moment, I know exactly what you're going through. I'm glad that you don't just blurt it out like I do! (actually, I usually sulk for a while then DH will ask me what's wrong then I blurt it out after saying nothing's wrong! Dumb I know!) If you're scared that you're not going to be able to talk to him and say everything that you need to then how about writing it in a letter to him. I did this once when DH and I were having a fight and not talking and it really got through to him. It wasn't nasty or anything, it was just letting him know exactly what I was going through and how I was feeling, I let him know that I was sorry cause I knew that I hadn't been the nicest person and that I loved him no matter what. He hadn't thought about it from my point of veiw before that (Guys can be selfish! lol!) but this really made him open his eyes and he was truely sorry afterwards. I felt weird writing my DH a letter but I knew that it was stuff that needed to be said and everytime I tried to talk to him, it never happened. This is just a suggestion, if you feel that DH will sit and talk without getting fired up then that would be better but I know everytime we talk serious I always forget to say stuff and think of it hours later when it's too late.

I'm praying that you did BD on the right day and that you'll get your BFP! Just remember that I had the same cramps and if I could have bet money on it, I would have bet everything I owned on me not being pregnant cause I swore AF was coming too. Even though it was ectopic, the doctors told me that a normal pregnancy feels exactly the same at the start so I'm still holding onto hope for you!
I don't know when my RE appointment is yet, I have to wait till she gets the opperation report and calls me so it could be a few weeks away yet. I'll be praying for you, stay strong and take care!

[Sarah_84]

Hi Jessica! I've been MIA too so don't worry! Being away from work for 2 weeks really makes life harder when you do go back and no one's done any paper work! Don't ever feel bad about coming on here, even though you've got 2 kids already doesn't mean that you have any less of a desire to have more. You are struggling the same as we are and we're all here to support each other. If anything, you give us inspiration! I hope the move went well for you! My Gyno / RE is gonna call me when she gets the opperation report so it'll probably be a few weeks away yet, I really just want it over and done with! That writing is amazing! I was so tempted to print out 100 copies and just hand it to every person who tries to put their 2 cents in but I thought that they might think I'm a bit crazy if I do that! lol! I am going to print it and keep it though! Thank you for sharing that! I hope you are going well! Take care!!!

[babyplease]

Hi Jessica, I just want you to know that I agree with Sara 100%!! Please don't EVER feel bad about communicating with us. I actually think that you even wanting to join our conversation is a blessing in itself. I get to actually meet someone who HAS been blessed with children and UNDERSTANDS what we are going through. It's a pleasure to communicate with you and not be told the usual (tips) on what I should be doing or not doing in order to get pregnant. Usually my friends with children have some silly advice to give me and of course it is not what I want or need to hear at the time. I am grateful that even though you have children already, you are still compassionate to people who are trying to get where you are. Your prayers and well wishes are appreciated now and once we do conceive (which I know we will one day) I hope that your experiences with pregnancy and childbirth can help guide us through that time as well. As the reading you posted states, people can have good intentions but be cruel at the same time. Even though you have already become a mother, you are working through some issues right now also, which makes us all sisters in it together. I like Sara wanted to print that as well and pass it out to everyone I know. It is truely inspiring and I will refer to it whenever I think I want to give up. It definately makes me remember why all of this is worth it as well as the updated photos you add of your beautiful baby. Thank you!!! I am glad that you are a friend. Regina

[babyplease]

Hi Sara, Thank you so much for giving me a little boost today. I really needed that. I woke up this morning thinking AF was here (early, not due till Wed. or Thur.) but it wasn't. I am sooooo tempted to go and take an HPT but I am too nervous. I think I will wait until I see if AF shows up . I thank you for reminding me that early pregnancy symptoms feel the same as an impending AF. I also read that in several places but as I am sure you know, it's easier to not get your hopes up. I really appreciate the advice you gave me on how to talk to my DH. I know I am just really emotional right now and I take everything more personal. I have discussed this issue with him in the past and he always listens and things are fine and then it's like he forgets a few months later!! Maybe I will try writing it down this time as you suggested. That way I can't get mad and say stupid things I don't mean lol. I am sure you understand. That's why I haven't said anything yet because I didn't want to come across angry or annoyed as I usually do when we discuss this topic. I don't want to argue, I just want him to understand me. You know? I love him deeply and I know that he would do anything for me and he is not trying to hurt my feelings or be unsympathetic. Like you said, He's just being a man!! I just have to keep reminding myself of that and I will be fine . He was very sweet and attentive to me this weekend even though I didn't say much so I feel more comfortable bringing up the issue now. Enough about me, How are you doing right now? Physically and emotionally? I know you are anxious to get everthing taken care of so you can ttc again. I know everything will be fine and this is just a hurdle right now. We still have 9 months left in this year so we have plenty of time to keep our goal!! It will happen for all of us. God loves us and hears our prayers. They will be answered. I hope you are able to get your appoinment soon. That will make things seem to be on track again once you get it. Then you can look at the glass being half full instead of half empty. I hope all is well for you and as always I am praying for all of us. I will keep you posted on what happens after my conversation with DH. Hugs and Kisses
Regina

[Mom2MandyandTristan]

Hello Ladies
How are you? All is well here (except for exhaustion lol). The move went well and we are still unpacking. We are having a housewarming the 15th and not sure we'll be ready on time. Tristan is adjusting well to the new place but we haven't let him travel too far (we're scared we'll lose him in this sea of boxes lol) but we are getting him a walker after everything is away. If feels wierd but great to have this much space and freedom. Now I can conecntrate more on my weight loss. Fortunately huuby and his friends put the elipitical together in our spare bedroom so I can use it. I also have been running up and down stairs & lifting heavy boxes for the last few days so I'm getting a workout,
Anyway enough about that, any new updates/news? Wierd thing happened to me, I got AF for the second time in 2 weeks. Has this ever happened to you?

[babyplease]

Hi Jessica, I am glad that your move went well. Sounds like your getting alot of great exercise also. lol Make sure that you don't overwork your muscles though. That can be bad news. I'm sorry to hear that your having AF issues. The stress that your under right now could be causing your body to react. Women have very complicated systems and any increase in stress ( your pregnancy issues and moving ), changes in diet, exercise, enviornment ect. can lead to unusual fluctuations in the body. I have experienced weird AF patterns before because of any one of these reasons. Stress is a BIG one. If you are concerned though, or this continues to be an issue, check with your doctor just to make sure there isn't something physically causing the bleeding. Hopefully it's just hormonal and you will be okay.
Unfortunately AF reared it's ugly head for me also so we are both not so happy campers !! There's always next month right? I have actually been thinking about taking a break for a month or two. Just to let the stress of ttc subside a little before we start over again. I know my DH would be okay with that. Ha, Ha. I hope your party goes well and that this is great move for you and your family. Talk to you soon! Regina

[babyplease]

Hey Sara, Haven't heard from you in awhile so I'm just checking on you. You okay? I hope all is well on your end. As you can see I got AF so nothing new here. I'm thinking abouot taking a short break for a month or two to regroup then start ttc again but we will see. I have to talk to hubby first. By the way, thanks for the advice, we talked and I feel better now. If you need anything, let me know. Sending you a big Hug and Kiss Regina

[Sarah_84]

Hi regina. I'm so sorry that AF arrived. I really feel for you. If you need a break, go for it. I've always been too scared to take a break incase we missed our chance but now that I'm on a forced one, I feel really good and ready to go again. Stay strong cause like you said, we've still got plenty of time to get our BFP this year and it will definately happen. (How great would it be if it happened while we were on a break!) I'm glad that you talked to DH and sorted things out, this is so much easier when you're both on the same page. Don't think of AF as the end of a cycle, think of her as the start of a new cycle cause that's what it is, one step closer to your BFP!

[Sarah_84]

Hi Jessica! I'm sorry you're exhausted but I'm glad the move went well! I've always had issues with AF because of pcos. in recent years they havent been that close together but when I first started AF there were sometimes when I'd have her for 3 weeks, nothing for 1 week then she'd be back again. Do you have pcos? If so then that could explain it but if not, it could be from stress or something. I hope you find an answer. Have you asked your doctor? I hope that you are going well and settling into your new place!

[Sarah_84]

I forgot to mention to you both that I have some good news. I spoke to my RE and she said that next AF I can start injections and do IUI's again to keep trying while I'm on the waiting list to have the endo removed. I have an appointment on thursday to make sure there's no cysts first and then I'll be clear to go!!! She said that I'll be fine while there's no scar tissue on my right. I know my chances of having another ectopic are higher now with or without the endo so when I do get my BFP again I'm going to go crazy with worry before my first u/s but I'm going to demand that I have the u/s at 5 weeks not 8 weeks this time or maybe earlier if my Beta is high enough. I'm praying hard that it all works out and that I'm doing IUI's again before the end of the month. Take care! Praying for BFP's for all of us!

[Mom2MandyandTristan]

Hello Ladies
I think stress is a key factor for me with everything. I believe it effects my AF, immune system, sleep paterns, eating patern, etc. When I was younger I always said these issues along with PMDD. I have to make an appt. with week with my gyn to make sure nothing else is wrong. A few months after I had my dd they found I had cancerous lesions on my cervix so parts of my cervix had to be removed (hence the imcompentent cervix and the reasons we almost lost Tristan 2 times). A few years after the surgery I had unexplained bleeding and they found the leions had returned and they were absorbing blood and then would leak (thats why I would have a very long "period" or get it 2-3 times a month).
Regina, I agree with taking a break and in fact I have started my break and joined another thread on here about losing weight and I joined sparkpeople to track my food/calories intake.
Sarah, that is great news, except the part about the endo and etopic :-(

[babyplease]

Hey Sara, That's great news!!! You can start trying even sooner than you thought!! Positive thoughts bring positive things. I am very happy for you!! I am well also. No worries or stress this time. Just patience. Hope you had a great weekend. I will check back soon. As always, Hugs & Kisses!! Regina