[bree35]

I am new to this site, but see lots of good things so far. I went off the pill over 10 years ago and instantly got pregnant only to miscarry 2 days after +test. Since then we did the charting the ovulation tests, had an hsg, tried clomid and injectible fertility drugs before our 1 IUI (all we could afford). After that we stopped. Luckily we still have a strong relationship. We got pregnant again suddenly (naturally) about 3 years ago with same immediate miscarriage. After filling out the adoption application and all but mailing it, dh said he wanted to try more aggressively with IUI or IVF. So, here we are. Dh has low sperm count and low motility, but that doesn't seem to phase him. Seems to think we just have to try harder. Isn't really taking suggested steps to increase count either!! Meanwhile, I'm nuts-o from stopping my antidepressant and taking clomid again!! Rounding out first cycle and it was frustrating!! No real temp pattern, no positive ovulation test (only very faint line which Doc "laughed off"). Then dh is frustrated because he's had to abstain and mad that I'm still holding out for a positive test!! Could he be any more insensitive!!

Have always had very strong marriage, but not so much affectionate soothing from dh. When expressed I need more of this now, HE gets upset!! UGH!!!!! How can I do this if this was only first cycle??? How can I nurture myself through this and keep marriage alive - not to mention intimacy? Feeling alone, crazy, and bitter.

me-35
dh-34
lover of 4 feline furbabies!

[sunshineshimmers]

I am really sorry that you are feeling this way. The road of infertility really sucks and no one really understands what we go through unless they have went through it themselves. Try not to stress out and take some time to do things for you....get your nails done, a massage or something to unstress you.
hugs and prayers,

[sarah16]

Just wanted to say good luck and welcome!

[Sarah_84]

Hi and !!! I'm glad you found us! I'm sorry that you are going through this. It is very frustrating and tiring. With the opk's, they're not considered positive unless the test line is darker or just as dark as the control line so that can be very confusing. As for your husband, it's great that he's wanting to do further treatment but I really think that you need to talk to him again about his support during all of this, if he keeps getting upset maybe you could try counselling for a few sessions just until he can learn to listen to what you have to say. I would try to get him on some sort of fertility vitamin (menevit is brilliant for counts and motility but I don't know how hard it is to get because I'm from Australia) because having a low count and low motility will make it a lot harder. I don't know if your insurance covers the treatment but if not maybe you could put it to him in money, then he might be more willing. like letting him know that IVF with low motility will require ICSI which is a few thousand dollars more or that the IUI's with low count and motility will most likely need a few more trys. As for obstaining, if your opk hasn't turned positive then you can still bd (baby dance - have sex) because it's actually worse to obstain for more than 3 days, the sperm quality drops dramatically and the more you bd the stronger the sperm become.
I hope I helped a bit, please keep us updated.
Good luck! xoxoxo

[bree35]

Thanks everyone for the words of encouragement! Sometimes you just need to hear (see) it from people who understand. I am feeling better and things are back in perspective -boy clomid can really take away the good vibes!!! Anyway, I did do some things for myself this weekend and opened up a little more to dh. Feeling much better. Thanks again!!