[lilprofesr]

I am new to this forum and just wanted to share my experiences with secondary infertility. I've been going through infertility treatments since June 2008 after my husband and I were trying to conceive on our own since May 2007.

I never thought I would be going through all this since we were able to conceive our son in about 2 months!! He is now going to turn 4 in January and we always thought we'd have 2-3 years in between.

We've completed (unsuccessfully) 4 IUI's and have to take this month off because of too many cysts. So I am actually back on birth control to shrink the cysts and hopefully start more medication in 3 weeks.

I've been on clomid, repronex, menopure and bravelle.

[sarah16]

Good luck, we too have secondary infertility and no one can figure out what's wrong. What is your next step? Are you doing to do another IUI?

[lilprofesr]

On November 10th, I go in for another ultrasound to make sure the cysts have shrunk and to have another consultation with our RE. At that time, he'll let us know if our next IUI will be our last. I think they usually say if you haven't gotten preggers by the 4-5 time than we would have to move on to IVF or keep trying on our own.

I personally don't think I could emotionally/financially go through IVF. So I'm really starting to get scared that this is really not going to happen. I'm am trying desperately to keep my hopes up though.

So how long do you think you'll have to wait for a match on adoption??

[sarah16]

We didn't go onto an IVF because it wasn't a sure thing for the money. At least adoption is a sure thing. We will probably wait between a year or two for our match.

[Cyndi04]

I just had to post after reading your threads. I'm so depressed, heartbroken, and in utter despair! Our 6th IUI failed since having our DD in May '07. She was conceived through IUI, and we just figured having #2 wouldn't be a big problem. Our RE will no longer do IUI for me (and I'm starting to agree with her!).....but IVF is just so much $$$ and there are certainly no guarantees. If our IVF failed, I swear.....I'm not sure if I could handle it. Just in case I can convince DH to try IVF, I've make an appt with an acupuncturist......will do that for 3 - 4 months before doing the IVF. I have read that it helps. Have you heard positive stories about acupuncture?
If I see one more pregnant lady, I'm going to have a breakdown.....for real!
-Cyndi

[sarah16]

I did accupunture for six months. While it didn't help me get pregnant, it did help my stress level.

[lilprofesr]

I have not heard of any going through acupunture for pregnancy....at this point i would be willing to try anything too!!

It is soooooo frustrating going through all these doc appt's, meds, blood work....I just NEVER thought I would be going through this journey. My sister went through IVF and we will be celebrating her (triplet) son's birthdays in November (they are turning 6!!) So thankfully I've had her to talk to as well about this since she's experienced just about everything until they decided to do IVF.

But it's also good to hear other stories as well so we can keep encouraging each other

I don't know how many ovulation kits and (negative) pregnancy tests I've taken. I'm just getting so nervous/anxious to see/hear what we will find out on Nov. 10th.

And, I'm really tired of people saying "be happy for the son you have!!" because I obviously am VERY HAPPY for our healthy little guy but that doesn't mean that I wished for another!!!

[lilprofesr]

How many IUI's did you have to do for your daughter?

[sarah16]

My daughter was conceived naturally. We didn't know we had problems until we started trying for our second child.

[kestewa1]

It is nice to find others that are suffering through 2ndary infertility. We got pregnant on the first try with our son (born happy and healthy in 2005). Tried for a year to get pregnant naturally, went to RE, tried clomid and IUI for 3 cycles. Uterine lining was thin (5) so moved to Follistim and IUI this cycle. Completing 2nd IUI today. I hope that we will have better luck with injectibles. I have also started exercising as I read that this can help with thin lining - increasing blood flow. I have thought about trying acupuncture - has anyone else had success with this? I never thought that we would be going through this. It was so easy the first time! Everywhere I turn there are pregnant women - ugh! Happy for them but sad for me. Then, dealing with insensitive comments from friends is almost more than I can take.

[ImHis]

kestewa1... I just wanted to say hello. I have never used acupuncture, but from what I can see on the boards, its all over the place as far as if it helped or not. There have been people get pregnant and not pregnant doing it.
Secondary infertility is a big struggle. I had 3 children 12,16 and 18 years ago with no problems. Now I have done IUI, 2 IVF's and one fet with donor embryos and still not pregnant. I am getting ready for another FET ont he 10th.
Its a hard road, but you are in a good place for support. Hang in there and dont give up.

[sunny72]

Hi girls. I was in the same place mentally and emotionally a while back. It took us three years to make a sibling for my DD who is 4 years old. We did 3 IVF's and 2 FETs and the final one worked for us. IUI's weren't an option for us unfortunately so we had to go straight to IVF. I didn't have insurance for it so found a couple of trial studiesy that covered IVF and the proceeding FETs. Unfortunately we lost a pregnancy along the way and it was devastating. I am fortunate to live in a mandated state and so changed my job so that I could get coverage. We spend quite a few thousand over the years getting to this stage but can't imagine the daunting prospect of having to fund it all ourselves. I feel for you.
We were seriously considering adoption also and I haven't ruled it out for the future. It truly is a wonderful thing, but definately something you want to be mentally prepared for I would imagine.
Sorry that you girls are struggling and feel hurt. It took us three years to conceive my daughter also and those were terribly painful years however the pain of secondary for me wasn't the same because she was here to love and cherish as you all do with your children. The worst part was the guilt of not knowing whether she'd ever had a sibling and she was getting to the stage when she was noticing other's around her with bigger families.
Good luck with your decisions and try and keep the hope alive of having another child one way or another.

[yolieight]

Hello ladies. We are also experiencing secondary infertility. We have a son that is 4 and he asks all the time if other kids can live with us. His way of saying that he wants siblings. I wish that I could tell him yes but all I can say is that we will try. My DH has zero spermcount after a surgery to remove cysts from his vas. We have no options open to us other than IVF for a biological child. We have failed at a fresh and a frozen cycle. The first fresh cycle with sperm retrieval and ICSI cost $18k with meds our FET cost $5 and this our last and final attempt is costing about $14 and that is with some donated meds. We pay out of pocket for everything because our insurance will not cover it. I'm only 28 but DH is 50, we can not adopt domestically because of his age unless we went with a private adoption which I think is very unlikely. I cherish our little boy but that doesn't make my desire for another child for him and for us any less.

Whatever all of our next steps are....I hope they are successful.

[RuthieT]

I am also going through secondary infertility. We have been trying for about 2 years now and with medical help since November 2007. We have done Clomid, HSG, Follicle Scans and 4 IUI's. We seen a specialist and he said should do injectables or IVF, but we cant afford that right now. So, we are trying things on our own right now with a higher dose of Metiformen and hoping that and along with some that our will come soon. We have a daughter that will be turning 5 next month and I am worried about the age gap and sad that we havent been able to give her a brother or sister.

[CarrieCC]

Hi Im new to this. My husb and I have been TTC for 1 year. We have two kids now. They are 5 and 3. Wanted to wait a while, when we got into a pattern and were ready for number 3. Never thought, guess you just can't plan everything. Both of our children conceived without assitance within 3-4 months of trying each time. Never thought we'd have any trouble, once we decided to go for the third. I am 31. Just thinking of making that 1st infertility appt....We have been thinking about adoption for a while, even before we had kids we would talk about it...he seems ready to explore that avenue...I'm not sure I am ready to let go of ever being pregnant again. Any advice, all this technical/medical stuff is overwhelming? Do you have tests first, then try meds? Does insurance cover anything/what are the begining costs? Thanks, Carrie