[demi]

Hi. This is my first time here.
I'm 34, have one bio-child (8 years/ from a previous
relationship.) My husband and I have been trying to conceive for three years and recently decided that we wanted to stop.. -Until everybody around us began announcing their baby news and we realized that we were far from stopping to try! We both have been tested and everything seemed normal... However we have now booked to go back to see the specialist to make plans for further treatment. Does anybody out there have any opinions /information about psychological factors causing secondary infertility? I know that in the past I have been anxious about how another child would affect or change the relationship between me and my son. We are very close also due to the fact that we were just the two of us for quite a few years until my wonderful husband and now also the father to my son came into our lifes. Also my ex who had initiated having a baby, left me once I actually did get pregnant..? We have recently moved country to live closer to my husbands side of the family, who have whole-heartedly embraced both me and my son into their gorgeous family. However as well as things are; in my heart of hearts i guess i have been worrying that perhaps once they would have a biological grandchild they would not want my son as much anymore... Could these thoughts and feelings be part of the puzzle of not having been able to conceive?
-Or am I just trying to come up with reasons out of thin air? Also has any one used the 'Persona' -system for charting their fertile times? -Demi

[fitkat]

Oh honey, there is not one thing out there psychologically that could be keeping you from getting pregnant. Stress does not cause infertility, infertility causes stress. And a number of other emotions. I can't tell you how many times I have been told, "You are stressing about it too much, you need to stop thinking about it.". It's pretty hard to stop thinking about it when it's not happening and you are watching others around you getting pregnant.
Unfortunately I don't have an answer for what's causing you to not concieve, but keep trying, and go see that fertility specialist.

Kathy