[Soki]

After carrying your child long enough to know it was your son or daughter then seeing that life slip away, where did you go to find answers? What were your questions?

[TMorris]

I can't truly speak for myself here, since all of my losses were first trimester (and therefore not considered stillbirth by any stretch of the imagination) and even though I was able to later learn their genders through karyotyping and had seen their hearts beating... I have a friend whose daughter died in-utero at the age of 22 weeks gestation. This was a longed-for, struggle-enduring conception, and her loss was imaginable only by others who've been there.

She went to a specialist for answers, a physician other than her own OB, and eventually learned that not only did she have PCOS (which she already knew and had been treated for in order to conceive) but that a sometimes-present factor of PCOS is inappropriate clotting issues. Her daughter had died, it was learned, as a result of constant clotting that cut off her oxygen supply slowly. While her pain is, of course, forever, my friend's newfound knowledge was invaluable toward her ability to conceive again and safely bring to term a baby boy several months later.

[sezangel]

In my case we new what caused my son's death at 37 wks! It was due to an accidental placenta abrution!! I had and still have many questions about why this happened but there are no answers to this question!! It was so hard as i blamed myself as there was nothing wrong with my son at all, it was my body that failed. 8 months after losing him we got pregnant again (very stressful), the specialists advised us that this is quite a rare thing to happen and changes were it wouldn't happen again!! It didn't but it didn't take away the fear