[lilac]

Originally Posted by Deej

I am still thinking in terms of cycle day, and how I would be on day 2 of clomid... It is not happening therefore it was NOT meant to happen! Like Kathryn said, at the end of the day, one month is not a huge deal. Enjoying it and allowing my body to fully heal is my focus for the next few weeks.
Lilac: you and i are on same cycle days, and i will probably get a little sadness around ovulation time as well. Have you ever done bbt to see if you can chart your own cycle? Maybe I will do so this month. I have always thought it would be neat!
KudleyGal and Alley: where are you ladies at?

I am going to try and focus on relaxing and staying healthy (and socking away cash for the next try!)... it is actually pretty great that we are on the same cycle now - we can face those tough moments together, with a lot of support from everyone else, of course.

I have been bbt charting since the cycle before I started iuis... I actually really like doing it. I know more about my cycles and when I've done an iui it makes me feel better to know that I've ovulated! Also, it makes me feel like I'm doing something towards ttc every day.

[kblythe]

Hey y'all.

I'm dragging a bit today. I coughed my head off for most of last night and had trouble sleeping because of it. Hey, Su, maybe pregnancy is wreaking havoc with our immune systems! By the way, I thought "gp" meant general practioner, too, so I don't think it's a purely English expression. Are you finding that you're relaxing after the ultrasound? I had one good day, and now I'm nervous all over again.

Terri, I'm glad things are moving forward. I'll keep my fingers and toes crossed for a BFP for you in February. Maybe you'll be like my friend, Jenn, who got knocked up quickly! And yes she was the one I accompanied to her IUI. Just think, years later I can explain to her child that I was present when he/she was conceived!

Deej, I didn't know about your sister. It's great that you get to spend time with her, and I'm sure you'll find a way to continue even after you become a mother. How is your weekend with "the man" going? Can you figure out a way to post his pic for all of us to enjoy?

Erica, You showed remarkable restraint when hearing about the 26 year-old pregnant for the 4th time. Sometimes, it seems unfair how easily others get pregnant. My friend Amy has three kids, but hasn't had a period in over 7 years. After her first child, she got pregnant with the 2nd two with the first egg her body produced. Needless to say, they weren't exactly planned pregnancies. And here I am, regular as clockwork, but having had a ***** of a time getting pregnant.

Well, I need to get moving. I don't know if I mentioned this, but my SIL's father died on New Years Day. She's in Cali. for the funeral, and I told my brother I'd head up today to help with the kiddos.

Kathryn.

[ELOVE]

Okay dumb me , I never even thought of gp as general practitioner. Okay so I've been in the military 18 years and we have ob/gyns and family docs. Well at least it gave us an opportunity to talk about grandparents. My mom's mom would be absolutely shocked if i were pregnant as I'm the last in our small family to have kids. When I do get pregnant (almost typed "if"), I vowed I wouldn't say anything to her until I was in my second trimester. Here's to the vow!!

Today marks 5dpIUI for me. I've been having what I'd describe as pangs all day. At first it felt like it was in my ovaries, but now here into the evening it's now a little lower, but definitely not in the middle like past my bellybutton. I'm trying not to analyze every little thing since last month I did and I could have bet my paycheck that on 8dpIUI I felt implantation. Yes Deej, the first week is an absolute breeze 'cause you know there is no point in "wiping" hard, or poas, or analyzing every little thing. I'm taking a different kind of approach this time. I want to be one of those girls who don't feel anything or have any symptoms and end up with a BFP. I do know one thing for sure, for my last two IUIs my nips (not bbs) were really sensitive, then about 3 days before AF they were not. So here's to... NO SORE NIPS!!

Deej--I'll be checking my email right after to catch a glimpse of this potential bedmate (okay let me stop being bad).

Kathryn--I'm so sorry to hear about your SIL's father's death. Please pass on to your family our sympathy.

Teri--I'm glad you're letting the past go and you deserve a BFP as well as any one. Good luck to you!

I used to be the girl who went in for a pap smear and had to stare at the calendar "trying" to figure out the start date of my LMP; boy how times have changed !

Have a good night ladies!

[Deej]

Speaking of grandparents, I have one left, she is my father's mother, and just celebrated 90 years of life! She has 8 children and I do not know how many cousins (her grandkids) there are! On a sad note, I was thinking that since I am the age I am, my own children's children will not know me if they too wait until almost 40 to have kids. At times I worry about how long my own mother will be around to see my baby. She is only 63 but has smoked all her life... But the most important thing is that I am ready to be a great mother NOW, not ten years ago!
Elove: I love your attitude about the two week wait. We are all rooting for you and will not bombard you with questions about symptoms, you just share what you wanna share!
Kathryn: I too am sorry to hear about your SILs death in the family. I hope she is ok and coping.
Terri: that is awesome that you are healing and feeling great about what is happening now!
Elove, do not feel as if you are being "bad" I love all the remarks about my bedmate! I am excited to see him and see what may happen!
Just earlier I was visiting with my brother's next door neighbor - not sure if I told you ladies but the person who was going to be my ob/gyno is my bro's next door neighbor. She gave me 3/4 trigger shots... She is pregnant and decided to stop working. Not just maternity leave (she is not due for another month) she is not going back to work! Anyhow, her husband is an anesthesiologist, and offered his services for free! I thought he was making another joke about his "buddies" but he meant if I have the surgery he will do it for me. I could have cried. I will keep that in the back of my mind, but just knowing he offered really touched my heart.
Elove: pic of the bedmate is coming soon. i will send two!

[lilac]

I hadn't considered that I wouldn't get to know my own grandchildren if my children wait as long as I have... I guess it is a possibility, but my family tend to be long-lived and healthy so I'm hoping I will. Thankfully my parents are both in good health as it's really important to me that they play a role in my children's lives. My own grandmother looked after me 5 days a week when I was little because my parents couldn't afford daycare then. I don't want my parents to miss the sort of relationship I had with the two I was really close to.

I am the eldest person in my generation and we are still the youngest generation in my family. My youngest cousin will be turning 30 this year and she's the youngest one in the family. It will be a pretty big deal when I have a child, I can tell you!

Erica, your attitude on the 2ww is completely right, I think. I've had cramps, and sore nips, and sore bbs, and various combinations of the above, but no bfp! You just can't tell...

Teri, that is great that you are healing... I too did not go to my ob/gyn as often as I should have (though not for the reasons you had). This whole process has at least calmed my anxiety about going...

Okay, Deej, I think I need to see a picture of your potential bedmate... wow, that is incredible news about the next door neighbour. What a wonderful offer!

[Deej]

Happy Sunday! I hope all you great ladies have had a great weekend...
I'm celebrating the beginning of a new year, new friends, and re-newed hope!

[Deej]

Ladies, Kathryn was kind enough to post about deducting medical expenses, and I have found an answer about donor sperm. I met with my C.P.A. today and asked if sperm was a medical expense, his answer follows:"

In looking at what qualifies as a tax deductible medical expense related to fertility issues, the IRS states you can deduct as a medical expense PROCEDURES TO OVERCOME AN INABILITY to have children. Therefore, if you do not have an infertility issue (a disease or condition affecting the reproductive system that interferes with the ability of a man or woman to achieve pregnancy or of a woman to carry a pregnancy to live birth) them it appears acquiring donor sperm simply for impregnation under normal circumstances would not qualify as a medical expense. If I find something more specific I will let you know."

[kblythe]

If you don't get pregnant quickly, though, does it become a medical expense? Just like the drugs, you have to pay every month!

I signed up for the daycare across the street from my work today. Apparently, even though I've signed up this early, I'm not guaranteed a space! Good grief! But at least I've started the process. I'm feeling nervous about it because I don't want to jinx myself. But I don't have the luxury of waiting!

Hope the rest of you have had a good day.

Kathryn.

[MissV]

I just joined this website because I googled "singles trying to conceive" and found this thread. I see the posts are a couple weeks old, so I hope I'm not too late. Just looking for others in a similar situation.

I am 40 (yikes!) and like many of you, decided not to wait any longer for Mr. Right. In the meantime, I was lucky enough to meet Mr. Perfect Sperm Donor. He is much younger, and just like one of you described your donor - good-looking, smart, talented, egotistical enough to want to procreate, but self-centered enough to not want to parent. (Also like you I lost my mother this past year.) He's a good guy, though, and despite his young age and our "casual" relationship seems very serious about what we call "Our Project." I'm excited and happy to have stumbled into this situation.

So far we have only tried twice. I'm in the 2 week wait right now, but not hopeful at all. I very clearly have pre-menstrual symptoms. I mean, I don't know what it feels like to be pregnant, but I assume it feels different from this. :-( I want to make the most of this opportunity, so that's why I'm here - educating myself.

I believe in positive thinking and remind myself that my mother had me at age 42!

Hope to hear from other singles TTC out there!

-MissV-

[Deej]

I am glad that you found us! Best of luck while in the 2ww! Of the singles on this thread, two are pregnant and the rest of us are trying... We are trying/pregnant via IVF or IUI. If you do not have success with au naturale and need to be move on to other options, we are here to answer any questions you may have!
You will find great information on this website, friendship, support and encouragement!

[ELOVE]

Ms V! Like DeeDee has said, you've found great support on this thread. These ladies are absolutely awesome! If au naturale doesn't work (especially since all of us are on time crunches), would you consider IUI/IVF.

DeeDee--Very interesting about the medical expenses. I hope you claim at least some of it.

Kathryn--Good for you putting your baby on the daycare waiting list!! You are moving right along. Question--Are you gonna put up one of those tickers so we can keep up with your due date? We wanna be there for ya!!

Well y'all said to let you know how my 2ww is going if I felt like it, so here it is. Today is 7dpiui, half way there and like everyone on this forum knows, the second week just drags. Today I've been feeling what I'd describe is needle poking on the inside. I thought it was only when I walk, but really it has come on gone all day today. It's not painful, but I can definitely feel it; it's actually just above my hairline and an inch to right of bellybutton (can't be ovaries right?). The happy optimistic me is thinking, "ooh, I may be implanting, and I wonder what the odds are for having twins since I had three follicles". If I have twins would I be able to handle it? Daycare would eat me a$$ up . Then the not so happy side of me (dare I say pessimistic?) thinks this month is no different than last month or the month before that. I've been touching my nips today to see if they're sensitive because that will be my sign it's PMS not BFP.

I've promised myself I would not poas until Monday or Tuesday next week (14 & 15 dpIUI), because I'm convinced if AF is gonna show it will be on Sunday (13dpiui the last two cycles). Bad, 'cause it's another failed attempt, but good 'cause I can sit at home and sulk all day and not have to put on my "work" face. As hard as I try not to be negative, sometimes I just can't help it. This is just the roller coaster we ride. I wanna get off like Su and Kathryn!

Well here's a question for everyone?

What are your hobbies or interests (other than trying to get pregnant)? Books (type, and last one you've read), movies (last one you saw). Where did you go on your last "real" vacation... things like that.

[Deej]

Kathryn: you writing about day care brought it all home for me, and i am not the pregnant one! what an exciting thing that is!
All ladies, we can benefit from the irs info, sorry if it was misleading... we do not have to be proven infertile to claim medical expenses, i believe the sperm law is for partnered/married folks where one of the parnters is an infertile male!
Elove: stop touching your nips!! you are GOING to make them sensitive and THINK it is pms! i feel this is your month, but completely understand about being overly optimisitic! your attitude is awesome, you will be able to handle whatever the outcome with grace!
YES I want off the roller coaster as well... Off and right on the other one, the pregnancy roller coaster!

Interests etc: i am currently watching "talk to me". very very good, harsh language, but good!
Last vacation: hawaii w/ favorite cousin this summer, paid for by my aunt! Reading: Brother Odd by dean koontz. hobbies: cooking, travel, spending time w/ lil sister... hanging w/ nephews and niece (not so easy after a failed iui - ouch)
I'm celebrating a great day at work, an answer to the sperm question and you ladies, keeping me motivated enough to keep going!

[kblythe]

Hey y'all, and welcome Ms. V!

First, I need to tell you and Erica about pregnancy symptoms. With my first, when I had the m/c, my symptoms were EXACTLY like PMS. I had abdominal cramping and sore bbs. I so expected to have a period, that I practically chafed my hoochee looking for blood! So just because you're having those symptoms, you can't assume that you are NOT pregnant. Of course, if you aren't having those symptoms, well that doesn't mean anything either. This time, I had no symptoms in the 2ww. Nothing. Actually, toward the end, I had some heaviness in my uterus ... sort of crampy, but not too much. So basically it's like reading frigging tea leaves!

Erica, if I had any idea how to add a ticker, I would! But I'm a bit of a computer moron. I'll try to figure it out, though.

Hobbies? Wow, we really are a similar bunch. I, too, like travel (probably a remnant of being an Army brat), reading (just finished Snow Flower and the Secret Fan ... I highly recommend it), cooking (since mom died, I cater most big family events), and I also play tennis, although that has taken a back seat with this whole FET thing.

I called my RE today about this stinking cough. He told me I could take Robitussin. Here's hoping it helps!

Kathryn.

[kblythe]

Hey, look at that! I managed to create a ticker!

K.

[lilac]

Good evening ladies!

MissV, ! It is never too late to join and you'll find that we're pretty active here on a day to day basis. Any questions, concerns, venting, whatever, we're here for each other!

Deej, good for you for finding the tax info... even if that rule is for couples, I'm pretty sure you could make a case for having a 'condition', esp. since your dr has recommended a lap...

Kathryn, way to go for signing up for daycare! You really do need to do it now if you want a spot. Your ticker looks great!

ELOVE, my nips were sensitive last time and now I can admit that I was constantly checking to see if they were bigger or darker! I think we all get a bit obsessive... but really, symptoms or lack thereof don't mean much, I don't think. We are all hoping for you!

Hobbies and interests... well, I read a lot, and write, spend time with family and friends. Lately I've been repainting the walls at home. My last vacation was last summer. I spent a week on an island fairly near to home with my aunt and my mother (it's traditional that we go away for a week together every year). It's been ages since I've been further afield... trying to remember when.