[lilac]

Ona, I'm afraid I was a party pooper today too... cleaning followed by shopping for me!

Deej, I'm sorry you are feeling sick. Ginger or something sour does usually help for me, like Ona said (though who knows how I might react to m/s). I was quite nauseous after my surgery and a sour candy did help (well, that and the shot they gave me!). I hope it doesn't get to bad and will pass quickly. Is it giving you a 'I really am pregnant' moment?

Well, I'm afraid I never figured pregnancy would be fun. I'm not expecting to enjoy it, but if I do, it'll be a happy surprise. But first, the getting pregnant... I bought an outfit today that I will not be able to wear very long into any pregnancy... so Murphy's Law being what it is, I'm bound to get knocked up on my next try. Hey, it's worth a shot!

[MissSalome]

I was re-directed over this way. I am 26 and a single mom already to a 6 year old little girl. Her father was a boyfriend of 6 months, and took off running when I found out I was pregnant. I met my husband when I was 23, we fell in love instantly, got married a year later, and started TTC right away. I always wanted a big, happy family, and I thought my dreams were coming true. I got pregnant the first month TTC, but sadly had a placental tear and lost the baby at 16 weeks. We began TTC again immediately. I also found out that I have the beginning stages of endo, and some scarring on my ovaries, although fertility wise I was told I am still in tip top shape. Sadly, 2 months ago, I lost my husband in a motorcycle accident. He was my best friend and my soulmate, and there is a piece of me that is no longer complete without him here. Those stories that you hear of people expecting their deceased loved ones to walk through the door are so real. The first few days it felt like a dream, like it couldn't possibly be real. The worst part is, I got AF several days after he died, so I knew we would never even have a baby together.

I started looking into donor sperm because in all honesty, I don't see myself finding "mr. right". I am extremely picky, and my husband was perfect. I am hoping to continue my TTC journey alone, and add to my family in a different way. I am hoping to find someone who looks like my husband, but it's proving to be extremely difficult. He had olive skin, blue/green eyes, and blonde hair, and a muscular/fit body type, and I can't seem to find a donor that matches him looking through profiles. I thought about doing photo matching too, but I don't want to spend a fortune on this. What donor catalogues did you use? Or do they offer them when you go to the doctor? I contacted a fertility clinic in my area, but haven't made the first step and made an appointment, I'm still a little nervous, afraid of being judged for being single or something and wanting a child!

[Deej]

I am glad you have found this thread! There are wonderful ladies here and in the other threads as well. You will find answers to questions, support, enouragement, and friendship... There are also threads regarding donor sperm/egg/embryo, so information is everywhere!

[lilac]

! You will find tons of support here.

My doctor deals with 3 different sperm banks so I have stuck with them, but there are tons of other places so I'm sure you can find a donor somewhere that has the characteristics you want. I have dealt with Xytex and Fairfax so far.

[silverbrumby]

Miss Salome!

Firstly let me say I am so sorry for your loss. I work as a paramedic so I see these tragedies unfold and I cannot imagine what you've been through. I hope you are surrounding by family and friends to give you comfort.

You have found some wonderful ladies here! They've helped me so much I can't even put it in words. I'm glad you found us!

As to donors, if you're looking for one that matches your husband in physical appearance then photo matching is probably your best bet. I've never actually been to any of the banks in person to know if they have photos you can look through but if you weren't already aware, Fairfax Cryobank is letting you see donor childhood photos free for all of July!!! So take advantage of that while you can!

[kblythe]

Good morning.

Welcome, MissSalome. I'm so sorry to hear about your husband. I can't imagine the pain of losing your soul mate. Hopefully, when the time is right and you do get pregnant, you will find yourself surprised at how supportive everyone is. I expected a lot more social censure after I got pregnant, but I have found almost universal acceptance and support ... or if people are being harsh and/or judgmental, they are wise enough not to say so to my face. I did not pick a sperm donor, since I'm pregnant with a donor embryo, so I can't help you there. It might be easier, though, to search by ethnicity rather than coloring. The egg donor who supplied the ovum happens to be my exact ethnicity -- german/english -- and we have the same coloring.

Deej, I am sorry that you're beginning to suffer some of the signs of pregnancy. But I'm also sort of happy, as m/s is generally a sign that things are going well. As for me, my attitude toward pregnancy was always skewed by the difficulty I had getting pregnant. I'm so grateful to be pregnant, that I'm oddly okay with the random pains, sleeplessness, etc. And this once-in-a-lifetime experience will be over before I know it.

As for the circumsision decision, I have, in fact, polled most men with whom I am close enough to ask. Most say to leave the penis as God made it, which is surprising considering that all of them are circumsized.

I had some Braxton Hicks contractions last night and thought I might be going into labor. But, alas, they stopped (leading me to believe they were the fake ones, anyway). Plus, it's still a bit early.

Hope the rest of you had good weekends. Jen? Ona?

Kathryn.

[silverbrumby]

Ooooooo Braxton-Hicks!!!! Kathryn, you're getting closer!!!!!

My weekend was a bit dull, but good. So far my Monday hasn't been too insane.

Tomorrow is my long awaited consult with the RE to find out what the "next steps" are. I can't say I am really anxious or looking forward to it because I've been too busy worrying about my appt on Thursday to have the ultrasound on my breast. Please send me your good vibes for both appointments.

How is everyone else doing???

[lilac]

Hi ladies,

I had a good, if quiet (and short) weekend.

Ona, good luck tomorrow! And Thursday!

Deej, don't you have an u/s this week too? Is it tomorrow or Thurs? I keep forgetting.

Kathryn, you are getting super close now. Speaking of which, Ona, we need to update your list! All the pg ladies are off by a week now!

All is well with me (except for the part where I'm at work). If AF comes on time (and there's nothing to say she will, but still... ) she should be here by Friday. Here's hoping!

[silverbrumby]

Blimey it's quiet in here today...

Jen, the list is now sorted. Bumped all the bumps up by a week. Can't wait to start hearing news of arrivals!!!

I hope our newbies and returning MIA lasses are still lurking out there. Please tell us how you're going.

I went out tonight and bought a rack of baby food for my friend's baby for while they are here visiting. It was an odd experience because the cashier asked me how old my baby was and I truly hated having to say I didn't have a baby and it was for a house guests' baby... then we were chatting about how I'm the one who borrows my friends' kids and teaches them bad habits just to annoy my friends and mentioned my friend's 16 year old whom I taught when he was 2 yrs old to make an "aaah!" sound every time he takes a sip of a drink...and he still does it to this day... then she was all "HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU DID THAT? Like 5?" and I was like "How old do you think I am now?" and she said "well if you had bought wine I would have carded you"... and then I told her I was 37 and she wouldn't believe me and even called over a couple coworkers to guess my age. It was funny. She thought I was 21. I do like that I can still pass for in my 20s, and it was an ego boost, but this is why I never get asked out... those scant few single blokes my age who DO find me attractive usually don't ask cuz they think I'm jail bait. LOL!

Ok, I'm off to watch this rather bizarre BBC television program. It's a bit campy, but I MUST watch it because it has one of my fave actors in it, and if I cannah have my own man I might as well drool over fictional characters.

[lilac]

Ona, the list looks lovely. I love to see those numbers climbing!

I haven't been even almost carded in quite some time...

Drooling over fictional characters is expected!

Oh, forgot to tell you guys I posted some photos on the Yahoo group - couple from the beach, couple of the family.

[styltryn]

Welcome MsSalome! Life is what you make it, and it's your choice if you want to be a single mom and can Much sympathy for your loss, and it makes sense you're not interested in someone new, yet want to continue to build your family.

wow, Deej, already 6 weeks and that's the classic time for m/s, so all's well with your I heard that making sure you eat small frequent meals helps as the m/s is thought due to acid in tummy?

Ona, u r 2 funny, teaching your friends' kids to be obnoxious! just wait til you have yours and need help sometime, I'm sure they'll all offer... and even the score some... ha! getting carded at 37 - wow! I thought it was special when I was just 30 or was it 32? I would have bailed too. I hate being "third" or "fifth" wheel with other couples. Ick. Housecleaning would be way more fun to me - mine needs it, so if you've any energy left, feel free to pop over... ha!

Kathyrn, that must have been intense - false labor - wow! I guess it could be the real labor any day now for you, then?
I'd never circumcise a baby boy... my two cents...

I had a nice weekend - yay, but today AF arrived with more cramps than usual, I think the acupuncture 2x/wk is really stimulating it more than usual... , but perhaps it will make this the month it happens for me ;-)


- I know I missed some folks, but it is past my bedtime! Had a long day!

[Viv]

Hellooo!!!

Sorry - it was a looong weekend, and I had a friend visiting from Poland (surprise visit! Her bo still lives here). Thus the long-ish silence!

Miss Salome, welcome! I guess you already realised everyone here will pich in where they can to help!! Good luck on your search!!

Ona, stop being silly about the way you look - you'd better start being more lenient on yourself - your body image WILL change radically once you're pregnant - trust me, it's not easy: I was 48 kg (106 pounds??) before I started the treatment and now I'm 60 kg (132 pounds). You have to take a deep breath and still feel worthwhile despite all the changes, and just tell yourself you can eventually get back to your old self (or close), but it will have to wait for now.

Deej, same goes for you - and as for the boobs hurting, the vomiting, the fattening (look above), just don't feel too bad - been there, done that, including the spotting, and trust me, all of it goes away - in 1 month or less if you're really lucky, you'll feel better (though you won't get slimmer, but even your weight will settle better - either that or you just get used to it! ) )

Thanks all for the + thoughts on the baby girl - I am starting to come around and seeing the positive points - I'll get there! Mindi, I guess it's the Jewish genes that may make the boy connection more attractive... I really don't know, just a theory...

As for the "hot topic" of circumncision, I really don't know where I stand...in Brazil (I'm 1/2 Brazilian - the bigger 1/2) it's common procedure nowadays to circumncise unless otherwise requested by the parents, but as you probably have heard, Brazilian surgeons are good with the scalpel, though normally in the context of nose/face/boob/you-guess-what jobs but, heck i have not heard of any major problems.

On the other hand I don't believe leaving things as they are as kathryn intends to do (very soon) is bad either.

I have to run now, but will be back later on.

Cheers to all,

Viv

[Deej]

Ona - i hope today's appt goes well. please post when you return from the doctor. i believe you also have a breast scan on thursday? fingers crossed and prayers going.... fyi i have not been carded in ages. from far away i do not look THAT old but the closer you get, the more the wrinkles come into focus. You go Girl!
kathryn - did the contractions come again??
lilac - i am off to check out the pics now!
Later this week I have u/s #2. The spotting has returned, but the cramps are mild. Everybody says the spotting is normal, so I will believe this to be true.
Happy Tuesday Ladies!!!

[Squeezan]

Hi! Sorry I've been MIA for a few days but I'm sure you'll agree I have the best excuse - Baby decided to make an early entrance into the world and arrived at 12.20pm on Thursday (17th)

Things didn't exactly go to plan. I spent almost 36 hours in labour then finally ended up with a c-section but I now have a beautiful baby boy called Oliver Benjamin. He weighed in at 2.64kg (5lb 13.5oz) and is perfect.
Su

[kblythe]

Yay Su! Way to pave the way to single motherhood! I'm so excited for you. I hope that you're feeling okay following your herculean labor effort and c-section. I love the name Oliver, by the way!

Kathryn.