[lilac]

Susan, I'm sorry about the bfn... I would ask about injectibles. Some women produce multiple follicles on clomid (I do) but others don't seem to every get more than one (you). Injectibles generally produce more. Since you've had a few iuis now without success, I think it's worth asking.

I am so tired today - didn't sleep well, and being jarred awake by the alarm in the wee hours of the morning in order to trigger was not conducive to good rest. Meanwhile, I thought since my boss is away I would get tons done at work only I appear to have been left a project that will double my workload this week. Worse, the Quality Manager is fussing about my incomplete internal audits since the external quality auditor is coming next week. I'm sorry, but I was kind of busy keeping the company running to worry about the audits. Now I have to do 4 in a week. Plus that double workload! I'm exhausted just thinking about it.

At least it'll take my mind off the impending 2ww. That's something. Paranoid person that I am, I did an opk today just to be sure the trigger was there (yes, even though I watched myself inject it!). It was positive (of course!) so I feel much better now.

[silverbrumby]

Jen, wow...sounds like a crazy week ahead for you. I hope you find a way to get some quiet time. My week started out a bit manic as well. I have to pull horsey foot duty every morning to switch out her bandages, which is a giant arm wrestling match and guess who always wins? Thankfully, tomorrow is my last day of adoption classes so that will free up some time.

Good luck with your IUI tomorrow!!!! I'm sending you tons and tons of !!!!!!!

[styltryn]

wow, trying to catch up on all the posts, and sounds like some rough times for some of the ladies on here lately...!

Sorry to learn of the BFN Susan. Supposedly DHEA helps make more and higher quality eggies... 75mg./day split to 3 25 mg. doses. I'd also take 1000 mg. Red Clover in a.m. once a day to see if it helps. Plus, I know it tastes like dirt, but wheat grass can work miracles for some folks!

Jen, you're so like me in some ways, I can tell. I'd look into a less hectic job by now if I were you. I'd look into teaching (bc that's what I did) to escape the industry rat race and craziness, but there are other options that are less stressful too. Like you, I also stick to my guns, but then sometimes have second thoughts at times! I'm sure you were right on and it will turn out well. All digits crossed and much for IUI perfect 10 success this cycle for you!

Kathyrn, I do not know what thrush is, but I plan to google for it... sounds like the worrying is far from over after the baby is born... yikes!

I had some twinges yesterday and stronger ones this evening. it might be the initial implantation. Timing would be right.

everyone I missed. I'm running a little behind still from the extra busy week with ER and ET.

[lilac]

Where is everyone today?

Styltryn, many . I am praying that you were feeling implantation. I know what you mean about finding the less stressful job - I took this position because it will look good on my cv. I figured (okay, yes this was a bit naive) that I'd be pregnant within a few months (I started the job only a few weeks before IUI#1), and go on mat leave and not come back, but have a nice little addition to my experience. Obviously it hasn't worked out that way. The problem is finding something less stressful that does not also come with less money! So we shall see...

Well, I got basically nothing done at work today through factors beyond my control. What should get done will simply not get done. I'm not to going to half-kill myself to try to meet impossible goals. Anyway... the reason I got nothing done was that when I got to work the power was out there and not expected to be back till the afternoon. I came back home and did what I could but there's not much I can do without access to the server at work. Then when the power came back up there, I could have run back and got half a day's work in, only I had my IUI in the middle of the afternoon - I would only have been there an hour! So no point really. I've gotten as much done as I can from home, which is not much!

In other news, I had my IUI today. And donor #4 came through - 37 million sperm, 70% motility! Woohoo! Okay, okay, but I've never had that many of the little swimmers before! Please oh please let one of them meet up with one of my eggs and hit it off!

Oh, and while I was there I talked to the RE about next steps. He says that if this one doesn't work I can continue with IUIs with clomid, but he cannot in good conscience prescribe me any other drugs (i.e. no injectibles for me) as I would produce WAY too many follicles. As I suspected. If this one doesn't work, I may be IVF-bound. I really don't want to do that, so I am hoping my hardest that #10 will turn out to be perfect...

[silverbrumby]

JEN! Lots of coming your way!!!!! I am that 10 is your magic number. YAY!!!!!!!!! you're now officially on the TWW!!!
Ok, so while it sucks that there's so much on your plate I am so glad you are taking the "well, it is what it is and I'm not going to stress myself out or overdo it" type of attitude. Take care of yourself first. If deadlines get missed then so what. Do your best and don't stress... after all, if there is one thing I've learned in the corporate world, it's that any company out there, will not hesitate to kick you to the curb if they have to choose between employee loyalty and saving their financial outlook.

I am SO there with you on the low stress fullfilling jobs being inversely proportional to the salary. I couldn't live on a paramedic salary so even though I loved the job I had to go back to I.T. Fortunately, I found this gig, but even this job pays $30K LESS than what I was making before because they have that carrot of teleworking. So, I am still trying to find ways to get by on a lot less than what I made before, all for the ability to work at home and not have to deal with corporate stress or a heinous commute.

Ok, so now I am rambling...I'm tired so my brain isn't working so well...

Today I haven't had much chance to be online because my rabid chihuahua of a project manager was on me like white on rice all morning. Can we say micromanager? Nevermind that I just turned in 4 major docs or that I have an overabundance of major projects I'd like to be able to get to if he'd just leave me alone for 5 minutes together... but I digress... then I had to go to a customer site to fix an issue for their system admin who is about as technically skilled as my dog. The fix took all of 5 minutes. At that point there was no way I could drive home and still make it to my adoption class so I stayed in town. Ran a few errands and then headed to class.

Last class was interesting. We had a panel of folks come to talk that included an adoptive parent, a couple that fostered then adopted and a mom who terminated her rights because she was a drug addict. Just hearing about all the medical, emotional, and abuse issues was very hard.

I now am sitting here and stressing out but not sure why. The class was emotional but not any reason for an anxiety attack. I got home late, so I was worried about my pets on the drive home, but again, nothing to freak about. I'm also worried for my injured horse and worried about finances but those aren't new worries and certainly manageable. I listened to some of the presidential debates which was kind of depressing because neither candidate actually answered the questions put to them, but again, nothing worth a freak attack... so really not sure why I have this nagging feeling in the back of my head like something bad is going to happen... it's that whole flight/fight response and I feel like you feel when you are in the basement hiding from a big storm and can't do anything but wait and hope it doesn't hit you.

Anyway, that's my day and please folks don't worry about me... just having a minor freak out for no apparent reason.

[lilac]

Thanks, Ona. I am feeling at low ebb at the moment, so I am trying to take care of myself first. While work is overwhelming, I can only give so much. I'm determined to do only what I can do, and not bring it home with me.

I do like my current salary and it will be helpful with the daycare costs, but I have to say that the lack of corporate stress and a heinous commute has a lot to recommend it!

I totally understand you on the micromanager... my boss is a total micromanager. I actually get excited when he goes away, simply because I will actually be able to get something accomplished without him interfering. I wish he would just let me do my job!

Your adoption class sounds really interesting, but emotionally wearing!

I too have been experiencing the stress/worry/something bad is going to happen thing of late. Much of it stems from my being overtired, I think. I found myself tremendously anxious this morning. After the IUI I felt much more relaxed. Had dinner with my brother and I feel like I am on a bit more of an even keel. For now, anyway! I know it will pass for you too.

Whatever possessed me to invite my whole family for Thanksgiving dinner? Was I INSANE?

Tring not to think about it...

[peggysue]

Hello ladies, where is everyone?????????? Its been quiet for a few days.

Lilac: that #10 will be the one. Sending you lots of .

styltryn: How you feeling?

Nothing new to report from me. I have my day 10 scan on 14th of this month and I've decided that this is the last month of clomid I want to do. I want to try something else. My only problem is the new hospital don't know I have had treatment in Manchester. When I inquired about it at my local hospital I was told that if I went to Manchester then I couldn't be on the waiting list at my local hospital so I didn't tell them and I haven't mentioned it since. So I think I'm going to fess up.

Anyway not much else going on here.

Goodluck to all in 2ww, sending lots of your way.

Sending Ona some extra special {{{{hugs}}}}

[silverbrumby]

Hehe Jen! I know how that regret over committing to something feels. I agreed to make halloween costumes for 4 of my friend's kids and now I'm looking at all the fabric and ribbon strewn in my dining room and dreading the work ahead and saying to myself "what was I thinking?!?"

Susan, so if you tell the hospital is there a chance you could get booted from their program? If so, I wouldn't say a word.... If you are concerned about trying to talk them into letting you use injectibles then you could say something like based on what you've read you aren't comfortable staying with clomid, or something like that.

Not much new to report here. Feeling less stressed than yesterday but still a bit edgy. I've had a hard time getting motivated this morning.

Time to go eat some brekkie and maybe that will help boost my energy a bit.

[lilac]

Ona, 4 Halloween costumes? Ye gads!

Susan, I really hope they wouldn't dump you if you fessed up. But if that's a worry, you could also say that you tried some time ago (before you were on the waitlist) with clomid without success. Or say that the clomid side effects are causing real problems for you.

[styltryn]

YAY Jen! sounds like IUI #10 went smoothly despite possible work hurdles! Sending much and all for your perfect #10 success! The swimmers parameters sounded fantastic! About the job sitch... I can honestly say that there is definitely a better job on the horizon for you *someplace* and sometime. I hope it's sooner than later!

Ona, I cannot know about why, but I could guess that perhaps attending the last in the series of adoption classes, makes you think about deciding between adoption vs. IUI method of becoming a mom more? Could that be it? If finances are such that you can only do one or the other, maybe the recent and normal little string of financial needs are bugging you more than usual? My general thing is to get busy, so I think making four costumes and working your butt off, is not such a bad thing at the present?

Susan, I think most RE's recommend a new protocol if 3 of the same ol same ol hasn't done it for you. Clomid is scary to me, personally, from what I've read, esp. as I'm well over 40 already. In general, each woman responds differently to different stims. Sometimes it's hard to know until you try 'em! I responded nearly identically on 100mg of Clomid, as I did on 450 units Gonal F! This cycle I was on Fostimon. I'd not fess up 'bout the Manchester hospital if it would make my life more difficult... but that's me!

For me, mild headache began last night and off and on this a.m. - hope it's not the precursor to AF that I often get. Still having infrequent minor twinges and taking it easy overall. at least one of the embies could stick it out with me!

[lilac]

Hi ladies,

Well 1dpiui and feeling not too bad... I checked my bbt this morning and I did ovulate yesterday. Much relief - just hope it was at the right time!

In the interests of taking care of myself, I did not work through my lunch break, but instead went into town and got myself a treat.

In the further interests of taking care of myself, I have gotten my brother to agree to host Thanksgiving dinner with me! Half the work! I feel much better now.

No other news from me - I am enjoying the few prometrium-free days though!

[Nightengale]

Hi Ladies!

I'm still here, just lurking. Nothing much new to report at the moment.

I still need to make appointments with an OB/GYN and an RE, plus I still have the appointment with my orthopaedic surgeon on Nov. 10. Not much to do until then.

I've been having MAJOR stresses at work, though and have been struggling with that. I love the company I work for and the people I work with, but I truly HATE the actual job itself. Unfortunately, I can't be picky and I need to be grateful for what I have, whether I like it or not.

Other than reporting what my docs say as the appointments come and go, I probably won't have much to say.

I've been taking a hard look at my financial situation and have a LOT of work to do before I can consider AI or adoption. Between school and my finances, I'll need every day of the next 3 years to get in shape, financially and career-wise in order to be ready.

It's rather depressing, especially when you hate your job. But with the economy the way it is, I don't feel that I have too many choices.

This is going to take a tremendous amount of discipline, hard work, and FOCUS to do what needs to be done. So that's what I'm doing. I've been in bad financial straits before and with a lot of work, discipline and focus, I got out and made tremendous progress. I know I can do it again, but it's not at all pleasant in the meantime. So my focus is shifting there now, which is why I may be more quiet on here for a while, with the exception of the occasional question. So if I pop in and out with weird questions out of left field, that's why.

But as someone else said, obstacles aren't put in your path to hinder you. They're there to make you prove how much you really want it. So do I want this badly enough to make it happen? I do. But that requires shifting my focus to get the rest of my life in order.

First things first, right? (Deep breath.)

I'll still be lurking though. And my thoughts and prayers are with you all! Thanks so much for such a warm welcome into your little community and for so generously answering all of my questions.

I'll keep you updated as the doc appointments happen.

Michelle

[lawgirl5]

Well, I guess I too may as well say "hello" and let people know I'm still here reading...lol! I'm anxiously counting down the time till Nov. 14 when I start talking to my doc about going forward!

Enjoy reading about whats going on with everyone and so anxious to be "one of you"...an actual tryer!!!!! Ok, out of here for the day....have a good evening everyone!!

[silverbrumby]

Thanks ladies! You always make me smile and feel better.

Jen and Styltryn, I am sending you lots and lots of baby vibes!!!!! I really hope this is it for you both.

And where is BabyBella?!? I'm wondering how you're tww is going??

Susan, I agree with what the other ladies said too... sometimes honesty doesn't pay and why complicate things? If your doc is a good listener then if you come in with a list of reasons why you'd rather move straight to injectibles, he/she might be willing to go for it. My doc suggested clomid and I thought it was strange since we'd talked about not using it because of my previous reaction, but turns out she was suggesting it only because she wanted to minimize costs for me... so the moral is, sometimes docs have their own motivations for a protocol that are non-clinical. When I explained that it cost the same for me because of insurance she was all for using follistim.

Ok, so where is everyone??? Mindi? Teri? Michelle? Becca? Deej? Kuddley?....... we seem to be adding to the MIA list...

Kathryn, I hope your thrush is clearing up... oh and I can't remember who asked, but thrush is a yeast infection. Babies often get it in their mouth/tongue. It's actually the same family of yeast as what us ladies probably are familiar with in other parts of our bodies... so imagine that itching on your tongue...or in kathryn's case, your boob! AGH! Just makes me shiver thinking about it.

Ok, off to do some sewing... wee!

[lilac]

It sure seems quiet on here lately. What happened to everyone?

I think Mindi had her IUI last week... and isn't it nearly time for MzVee's ultrasound?

What about you, Ona? Any sign that AF might arrive early?