[mercedescat]

I'll be 40 in 3 months and just m/c at 7 weeks after our first attempt at IVF. We are waiting for tests to explain why. We have 2 frozen blasts waiting. Has anyone been in a similar situation but chose to do another fresh IVF cycle first to get more embryos for future use? We are still trying for our first child.

For instance - if the FET works, and we wanted to try for #2 - wouldn't be able to do that until at least 41. Wouldn't it be better to use 39 year old eggs instead of 41? And if the FET doesn't work, we'd need another fresh cycle anyway. As an only child who hated being an only child, I was hoping to have at least two children.

Please let me know your thoughts. Trying to look toward the future and not dwell on what's happened so much.

[StillWaiting410]

I'm so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you.

I never experienced the loss you did, but we had two frozen blasts and were on the fence as what to do next (new IVF vs FET). After a lot of thinking, talking, and praying, my DH and I decided on a new IVF cycle. Everyone has their personal reasons, but ours were 1)age. we knew we wanted to try for more than one child. By doing another fresh IVF we were able to use my eggs at my age now, not years from now. 2) we were afraid to loose both frozen embryos in the thawing process and have more time wasted. 3) RE's advise was to also do a fresh cycle. 4) IVF is covered by my insurance. Once we achieve our family, I was planning on being a stay at home Mom. We would no longer have insurance coverage for another IVF. 5) by doing a fresh IVF, if we had any left over embryos after completing our family, we opted to donate them to couples/people for adoption.
In the end, I was very comfortable with my decision. But it is a very personal one. I got advise from a lot of people; family, friends, ladies on this forum. Many contradicted each other. It's a tough choice to make.
I pray for your soon-to-be family
Greatest luck to you!

[mercedescat]

Dear Beth,

Thank you so much for your thoughtful reply. I am glad I am not the only person to consider such a thing. Besides the cost (our insurance doesn't cover) and having to go through the stimulation again - I can't think of any other cons since time is a factor.

Thanks again for your response - I will pray that your upcoming FET works!

Tracy

[Chloe40]

Hi Beth and Mercedescat,

I was just about to post this exact question when I saw your post. We're struggling with the exact same question, and I'm 40.

We're trying to figure out our next steps after a miscarriage at 12 weeks following our first IVF. We have 4 frozen embies and are trying to decide whether we should do a new fresh cycle before I get any older (and hopefully use the frozen embies later for a sibling) or do an FET next and hope it works. If the FET doesn't work, then we're back to IVF at age 41 - older eggs, aaaaaack. If we do a fresh cycle now, at least my eggs are slightly younger..

Right now I'm so scared of losing another baby. I don't know how people cope.

Have you made a decision, Mercedescat? We are leaning towards a fresh cycle for the reasons you mentioned, but we don't see the RE until January so we'll see what she has to say. We're paying for this out of pocket, but that's not the main concern. I'm more worried about my age and every step taking another month away...

I'd love to hear anyone's advice on doing a fresh vs a frozen cycle.

Good luck to everyone!

Chloe

[Peabody1]

I'm sorry for the loss that you both have suffered. I am 38 and did a fresh IVF cycle at age 37. I had a missed miscarriage at 10 weeks so I know what it is like to suffer a loss and be a little bit older as well. I am fortunate that I have 13 embryos on ice and will use them and hopefully one of them will be my miracle baby or babies. That being said, if financially you are able to do another fresh cycle and if you respond well to stims then if it were me I would do another fresh cycle in the hopes of getting more embryos to freeze for later use.

I hope that things work out for us all and that we get to hold our miracles soon!