[2LinesIn09]

Yesterday I had my IVF calendar review. It's funny how we have been discussing this for so long, but it took one yellow piece of paper with perfect penmanship and a whole lot of dates to suddenly make it all real. So here is the lowdown on my *estimated* cycle. I hope you're ready for some head spinning info, because mine hasn't stopped yet. Assuming that AF shows her ugly face on time on the 18th or 19th, I will have my baseline ultrasound and estradiol levels checked on Day 2 of my cycle (19th or 20th). Provided that the u/s goes well, I will start the gonadatropins (300 Follistim and 1 vial of Menopur) the next night (20th or 21st). Then, around the 25th, I will go in for my first monitoring u/s and estradiol check (and pre-op and CBC). Apparently that is the last day I am allowed to exercise and travel. *sigh*. So much for my daily gym routine. Then I will be seen every 1 to 3 days for the remainder of the cycle for monitoring. On the 26th, I will start the antagonist medication (Ganirelix 250 mcg) and I will increase my vials of Menopur to 2. Provided that I stim in the estimated 10-11 day range, that would put my Egg Retrieval somewhere around July 29th or 30th. YIKES! I swear they had mentioned August Retrieval to me before. Of course, nothing ever goes "normally" in my life, so this date could be pushed out another 4 days if I stim for 14 days, pushing it into August. They seem to think that the 13 days I stimmed last time was just a fluke, but we'll see. If I do only stim for 10 days though, that would put my Embryo Transfer on August 1st, one day before our one year anniversary (or possibly even on our anniversary)! Hopefully this year, we will get a nice belated Anniversary BFP! Then I start progesterone shots the next day (luckily I am a PIO injection veteran, so those don't scare me.). I'll have my post retrieval visit on August 8th. And if this all goes as planned (here is the best date yet), my first beta will be on August 13th. 13 never was my lucky number, but maybe, just maybe this could change all that.

[JustOneMore]

Originally Posted by SouthhamptonS

Justonemore- I know right. It seems to be only directed to DH right now but I know how that goesAre you having any bloating as well?

Cagirl - I don't know why but it sure makes me *****y. I use to get very bad headaches as well. Luckly that has not happened this time so far. But I am bloated though. It is so amazing that same meds same dose but different side effect. Strange huh!

Samantha

So, Lupron essentially puts your body into menopause...totally deprives you of estrogen. I am not one to suffer from PMS related moodiness so the Lupron really threw me for a loop. I wasn't so much b*tchy as I was super sensitive. DH would make a joke and I would get so upset, I'd have to walk away. And I knew I shouldn't be upset but I couldn't control myself. It was the craziest feeling -- knowing I was seething for no good reason but not being able to calm down. He'd follow me like a puppy..."what? it was a joke". We had to have a little talk about what it was like to me just then so he understood but we did have a few rough days until he got the hang of it. Headaches is another blessed side effect as is weight gain. Oh, and libido? Gone. I am on dexamethasone too which is also causing weight gain and insomnia (which is why I am up at 3:43am). As soon as you are off the Lupron, your mood should return to normal. I started an estrogen patch on Thursday and starting feeling better right away.

Because I am super vain, I have been exercising an hr a day (most days) and restricting carbs. This has helped a lot with the bloating but I am still up enough in weight that my pants are tight and some I can't even wear. It's killing me but I know it is for a good cause.

I start stims on Thursday night. I am so itching to get started!

[JustOneMore]

Originally Posted by 2LinesIn09

Yesterday I had my IVF calendar review. It's funny how we have been discussing this for so long, but it took one yellow piece of paper with perfect penmanship and a whole lot of dates to suddenly make it all real. So here is the lowdown on my *estimated* cycle. I hope you're ready for some head spinning info, because mine hasn't stopped yet. Assuming that AF shows her ugly face on time on the 18th or 19th, I will have my baseline ultrasound and estradiol levels checked on Day 2 of my cycle (19th or 20th). Provided that the u/s goes well, I will start the gonadatropins (300 Follistim and 1 vial of Menopur) the next night (20th or 21st). Then, around the 25th, I will go in for my first monitoring u/s and estradiol check (and pre-op and CBC). Apparently that is the last day I am allowed to exercise and travel. *sigh*. So much for my daily gym routine. Then I will be seen every 1 to 3 days for the remainder of the cycle for monitoring. On the 26th, I will start the antagonist medication (Ganirelix 250 mcg) and I will increase my vials of Menopur to 2. Provided that I stim in the estimated 10-11 day range, that would put my Egg Retrieval somewhere around July 29th or 30th. YIKES! I swear they had mentioned August Retrieval to me before. Of course, nothing ever goes "normally" in my life, so this date could be pushed out another 4 days if I stim for 14 days, pushing it into August. They seem to think that the 13 days I stimmed last time was just a fluke, but we'll see. If I do only stim for 10 days though, that would put my Embryo Transfer on August 1st, one day before our one year anniversary (or possibly even on our anniversary)! Hopefully this year, we will get a nice belated Anniversary BFP! Then I start progesterone shots the next day (luckily I am a PIO injection veteran, so those don't scare me.). I'll have my post retrieval visit on August 8th. And if this all goes as planned (here is the best date yet), my first beta will be on August 13th. 13 never was my lucky number, but maybe, just maybe this could change all that.

Getting that calendar really does make everything come to life. My RE's office provides a color coded version with all injections listed -- I am doing the agonist cycle which is much longer and more involved so it is really helpful. I x off everyday after I completed the meds for the day. I just love to see the progress! It will be here before you know it!

[cagirl2003]

oh gosh...it lowers your estrogen. great. that's the only thing that seems to make me happy lol

[Bella16]

2LinesIn09 - OMG - how exciting for you!! It IS amazing how we just need something written on paper, to make something more real!! And getting excited about getting a period and shooting up drugs <-- I would never in a million years have thought I'd be excited to do any of that - and look at us now!! hehehe We're sounding like we're going to be very similar in our timing - thats awesome. I dont have my protocol yet - but I hear it'll be coming today or tomorrow!? I start Suprefact injections in 2 sleeps and I imagine I'll get my period about the 15th (or so) then... baseline US and if all goes well, stimming shortly after!! OMG, I cant wait to get my calendar! hehehe PS - My fav numbers are 7 and 13 - so I'll send some 'positive 13' vibes!!

You guys are sounding like you're going through what I did when I was on Clomid <-- that stuff made me a raving lunatic - ask my DH!! Usually I could feel it coming and would warn him to just keep his mouth shut ('Or I wasnt going to be held responsibe for what was about to fly out of my mouth' hehe) And it was always soooo uncontrolable - I'd know what I was saying or doing was irrational, but I couldn't stop it!! Oh the cr@p we put our bodies through!!

It IS for a good cause - pretty soon ALL OF US are going to be complaining to eachother about the ugly maternity clothes out there - the puking - ahhh who am I kidding - I dont think there will be too many complaints going around from us!? AS I'm leaning over the toilet puking, MAYBE< but as soon as it passes, I'll be doing a wee happy dance!



Sounds like Suprefact and Lupron are very similar as Suprefact also throws us into early menopause <-- oh joy! I got a couple headaches but that was about it - I was amazed. Let's hope it stays the same this time as well - but we all know - not every cycle is the same, even if the drugs are!!

[cagirl2003]

how do you girls stay upbeat in all this? i'm going through a rough patch (maybe cause i'm just waiting to start lupron)...but i just honestly can't remember the last day i was truly happy. is it the birth control? is it me? i can't tell anymore. feels like the hormones and me...there's this blurry line.

anyway, i'm just venting and sorta curious how you girls handle it. i feel like a wreck.

[Bella16]

cagirl2003 -Awe honey - we all have our good days and our bad days - I just try to make sure there's more good days! Sometimes that can be a pretty tough thing to pull off. Just wait til I see how many follicles/eggs I'm growing and triggering and the actual retrieval.... or the wait between the ER and the ET <-- Than you can count on me not being as cheery! hehe Sad, but true.
I know how you feel though, and yes, it can also be a lovely side effect from the BCP's - sooo glad I didn't have to do those again. I just have to keep reminding myself that all this stress and pain and hormones and weight gain - will all truely be worth it, when about mid August, I get my long awaited BFP!!
I still have days now where I think about what I'm about to do, and I cry - scared of going through it all again, to come out with a BFN in the end. Then, I push that thought aside, wipe the tears away and focus on how lucky I am to even be able to do IVF <-- Soooo many women/couples will never get this chance that we have, and for that, I'm thankful.
We're doingall we can - yes, it absolutely sucks to battle IF, and so few understand - but hey - we're here for eachother - to vent to, cry on and lean on - I personally would go mad if I didn't have other women to talk to about it.... women who truely understand what it's all like - not those who pretend to know...

Vent anytime you want to - it's what we're here for!!
Now quick, go have a beer, before your pregnant and it's too late!

[cagirl2003]

thanks bella! it really is hard to process it all. honestly, my first ivf i was SO excited. i literally thought it was the best thing EVER. even the shots. cause i truly thought it would work.

i think knowing this fear now, i've lost some hope in it. i went from being on top of the world, to now just expecting it to not work.

and i know that's not healthy, but it's true.

i've got to find a way to fight this depression.

i'm so thankful for you girls too. i couldn't do it without a support group. my husband is so understanding and amazing, but since the IF is "technically my fault"...sometimes i struggle.

thanks again.

[SouthhamptonS]

cagirl - I so feel your pain . I sought the help of a professioal this time. I need a plan in motion in case it does not work. Just try to stay as positive as you can. How are you keeping busy? - I am reading a lot. Just easy reads but it takes me to another place. Just try to take care of you. I feel this is the greatest place to find support. Only someone dealing with this could truely understand the day to day struggles we face. Keep your chin up. As I am sure we are all trying to do

2linesin09 - How was your vacation? for your plan. I love to know what is in store also. We are all so close

Samantha

[justone]

hi all, new to this thread. I just started gonal and repronex this past fri and had first us/bw. all progressing well so meds will stay the same. ER maybe 7/13. the gonal pen is destroying my stomach. the nurse almost flipped when she saw how black and blue I was. generally, i don't bruise easy so it is kinda weird.. So on top of weight gain, and headaches, now I can barely button my pants b/c my belly is so sore.....
cagirl, it is hard to be upbeat b/c basically dealing with what we are all dealing with is just so unfair especially when you see some of the people out there who are having babies. I use exercise tokeep my sanity. I also really try hard to think of the best outcomes. I agree with you, my first IVF cycle was just awesome b/c I just 100% thought it would work. well now I know better so I'm more nervous with this one. I have really liked this forum. It is so good to hear other's experiences and sometimes a place to just vent to someone who won't judge and usually knows exactly how you are feeling has been helpful for me. So on that note...wishing us all so we can complain about morning sickness

[2LinesIn09]

Originally Posted by SouthhamptonS

cagirl - I so feel your pain . I sought the help of a professioal this time. I need a plan in motion in case it does not work. Just try to stay as positive as you can. How are you keeping busy? - I am reading a lot. Just easy reads but it takes me to another place. Just try to take care of you. I feel this is the greatest place to find support. Only someone dealing with this could truely understand the day to day struggles we face. Keep your chin up. As I am sure we are all trying to do

2linesin09 - How was your vacation? for your plan. I love to know what is in store also. We are all so close

Samantha

Thanks for asking! My vacation was AMAZING!!! DH never takes time off from work so it was wonderful to have him all to myself for a week. I got some really great pictures in Hawaii. We did a lot of snorkeling and took this wonderful boat tour of the Na'Pali Coast. I got these amazing pictures of the porpoise family swimming beside the boat. The captain let us snorkel for an hour in pristine water and we got to swim with sea turtles. It's so nice to have time for photography again. Photography is a huge hobby of mine, but I haven't done a lot of it since the m/c. Starting to get back on trsck now finally.

[SouthhamptonS]

Good Morning Ladies - I hope everyone is doing well


justone - Wow glad to hear your follies are growing nicely. Keep up the good work

2lines - How beautiful! It sounds like you and DH had a wonderful time. What a great way to start a cycle. Glad to hear you are enjoying taking pictures again. I know it takes some time to feel "normal" again .


Well all is the same on the Lupron front. Can't wait for to arrive.

Samantha

[cagirl2003]

you girls are just amazing. really. and i can tell you truly know how i feel.

i'm so sorry about your bruised tummy and i hear ya on not being able to button your pants LOL same here.

i do exercise...but then once i stim, i can't as much. i need more hobbies. but get all bummed out and lose motivation to find one LOL isn't that nuts.

[MaggieMay75]

Hello ladies!

JP - I would take Lupron over bcps any day too!

2lines - Our schedules are very close. I'll be retrieving the end of July with a transfer the first few days in August! It is going to go so fast!!!

Just started my shots on 7/6 and saw my first belly bruise this morning. The first of many, I am sure!

Did any of you get/use EMLA cream with your PIO shots? Did it work?

I am dreading the IM shots because they are really painful for me so I am wondering about the effectiveness of EMLA cream...

WOO HOO ladies we are off!

[Bella16]

cagirl2003 - You're welcome - and with my 1st - I had a mix of emotions - from down right sure it worked, to positive it didn't - it was a hellish 2 weeks for sure. I'd read forums and soooooo many ladies got a BFP on their first try that I was hopeful it would happen for us too. Turns out, we're not that lucky I'm not sure how these next weeks are going to go for me - probably the total mix of emotions again!? Ahhh time will tell..... and we have eachother to vent to, so that's good.


justone - - oh wow, you are quite a bit ahead of the rest of us..... how exciting!!

Ahhh the sore belly - been there, done that. The Repronex is the WORST!! I'm a Personal Trainer and an avid runner (tho I HATE running, I only run cuz I love food hehe) Anyways, the day after my first Repronex shot, that's it, running was officially done - my belly was too sore!! And I also had to start wearing workout pants to work as well, as my jeans were killing me sitting at my desk..... oh the joys of it all.

2LinesIn09 - OMG your vacation sounds absolutely fabulous!! Such a GREAT way to start off a cycle - nice and relaxed and back into the picture taking mode!! You go girl......

cagirl2003 - Same here girl... I use exercise as a stress reliever, but once stims start - I seriously limit my exercise. I too need to find another hobby - I gues I could get out there and take some pix..... that would keep me distracted... I havent taken any since our trip in March. Napping is also a good hobby - and my last cycle, I was told by my acupuncturist, to nap/rest as much as possible as my body was going through so much and it needed the extra rest to continue what it needed to do and get the best outcome. <-- A prescription I dont mind filling hehehe

Speaking of which, I start acu again tonite. A lil nervous about it though. Last cycle I did it, but towards the end, any needle that went into my legs or feet, hurt me - so it was stressing me out to go. I talked to my acu guy, and he said he'll try points in my ears first, to try to relax me first. We'll see if that works, if not, I just might not do it this time. I dont need to be stressed out every time I go.....

I pity all you ladies who have to do the progesterone oil shots!! ACK - no thanks!! We may not get put to sleep for our retrievals, but we get to use the suppositories - as nasty asthey are, they have to be better than shotting a huge needle in my butt!? hehehe

I'm calling my clinic today to get my schedule - I'll keep you all posted - I cant wait to get it. And, when I talked to my RE last time, he said he was going to add Intralipids as well - as a precaution, in case that's why my last cycle didn't work!? (Any of you tried them?) Plus, I had a buttload of blood taken a couple weeks ago <-- be interesting to see what, if anything, was found from it. Seriously, I think I counted 12 vials they took - I was asking if I get juice and cookies after they were done hehehe