[anilorak13ska]

I originally wanted to adopt. Then I learned about gentle birth and romanticized about a home waterbirth. Then we got a diagnosis of azoospermia.

I automatically moved on to adoption. We spent over a year pursuing independent adoption, with two failed matches. Then I thought I was experiencing miracle implantation bleeding, so I joined these forums. Then came, but the hope was reawakened in me.

I had recently started following the philosophy of "leave no stone unturned" (which led us to be licensed foster parents), so I put my preconceived notions aside and began to learn about all of our options on the fertility side, which led me to discover natural cycle IVF (which jived with me for numerous reasons, especially ethical).

Then our 7 month old foster daughter came to live with us. The next day, we abandoned the idea of conceiving as well as the idea of adopting a newborn. We are now getting used to parenting a baby for however long Baby V will be with us, but our focus has shifted entirely to adoption of a toddler or preschooler from foster care.

It has been a month since our FD came to us and since we decided to adopt a slightly older child. I am completely at peace with the idea of never getting that , of never being , of not experiencing the empowerment of a gentle birth, of never breastfeeding.

We have not found our forever child yet (we expect our FD to be reunited with her bio family at some point), but we are confident that God has led us down this curvy road for a reason.

I that everyone here becomes open to what God intends for your family's future. It won't be easy, but it will definitely be worth it in the end!

[momtocats4now]

Can I just say how much I love you? I was adopted when I was 12 by family members and it's the best thing that ever happened to me. My "new" mom has been completely supportive of this whole process and was behind us about a year ago when we considered adopting a friend's baby. To have someone that is not focused entirely on infant adoption and understands that the older kids need forever families just as much is such a blessing for your future children! Good luck with everything!!

(and remember, most people think that once you adopt, all of your infertility issues go away and magic happens!! )

[anilorak13ska]

momtocats I secretly wonder if I should adopt an 8 year old girl. I came to the US at age 8, and that's the age of my inner child (lol). But I know that individual personality can make all the difference, that it's not so much the age as it is the individual.

I guess we'll just wait and see. If DSS calls with an elementary aged child (though I can't handle challenging behavior, I must say), I'd love the chance to foster him or her to find out first-hand.

Btw, a big fat CONGRATULATIONS on your and thriving little one! May your be laden with little moments of joy and satisfaction, and may your birth be gentle and empowering.