[30somethingmom]

It seems that many of us have similar stories. I thought it would be interesting to see what else we have in common. For those who decided to adopt after experiencing infertility problems, how long did you try to conceive or have a baby biologically before moving on to adoption?

I'll go first. After 2 miscarriages and 4 years, we made the decision to adopt.

Anyone else?

[hopetoadopt472]

10
long
years

1 miscarriage

no coverage for IVF
30% chance with IVF of conceiving

NEXT OPTION!!!!

[swtpea]

Hello! We adopted after 9 yrs. We celebrated our 10 yr wedding anniversary and brought our little angel home 5 months later. We had 1 misscarriage and tried everything up to and including 1 cycle of IVF. A few months ago our insurance actually gave us a small amt of coverage and we tried 1 round of frozen IVF. It didn't work so end of this yr planning on adopting 2nd time. My husband wanted to move right to adoption again but I just couldn't leave frozen and not try. Now I have complete closure and couldn't be more excited to adopt again. Our little girl was the best thing that ever happened to us.

Tracey
proud mom of 2 yr old Kira 2/04

[Imani68]

5 years---3 AI and 3 IVF cycles. Adopted our 3 year old son at birth....best thing we ever did.

[daniellebalmer01]

Right before my son turned 2 (no infertility meds, just conceived naturally - go figure) we started trying for another one. Well, it was 5 years ago last month and after several cycles of clomid, gonal-f and IUI's we decided that adoption was meant to be for us. Rather than possibly "wasting" our money on IVF (success rate not that great) we decided our money would be put to better use by adopting a child that is already here (or will be soon) and needs a family. It's funny, once I came to the realization that adoption was what we're going to do I have felt much more at ease and even more importantly, realized that having a baby, not being pregnant was what mattered. Regardless of how our baby comes into this world does not matter to us - we just want to give our son a sibling and us the baby we've been praying for.
We are currently in the "waiting to be matched phase" and hope to have a baby this summer. Our agency and social worker have both told us that we should have our baby this summer sometime.
To all of you wondering what to do, only you will know what is right for you and your family. I wish you all the best.

[blessedbybug]

Originally Posted by 30somethingmom

It seems that many of us have similar stories. I thought it would be interesting to see what else we have in common. For those who decided to adopt after experiencing infertility problems, how long did you try to conceive or have a baby biologically before moving on to adoption?

I'll go first. After 2 miscarriages and 4 years, we made the decision to adopt.

Anyone else?

We made the initial decision to explore adoption about two years after starting TTC. DH and I are both older and on a very short timeline. After waiting for a homestudy (that never happened) with Children's Services, we contacted an agency in Aug '02, which was when we officially stopped trying... so 3 years total of TTC before we pursued adoption fully.

[starbright7543]

Well we have been trying for 4 years with clomid, IUI, IVF, and one last frozen embryo. Next thing we do after trying the frozen embro is adoption. Has anyone adopted in Canada?

[Janet]

We tried on and off for 13 years before we tried to adopt. I was in graduate school some of that time and when we could not afford a private adoption, my husband was not ready to try foster care adoption. We struggled with that decision for awhile. We did eventually try it did not work out, but it seemed to help put infertility to rest. I don't think we will try to adopt again.

I still struggle with the lonliness of being childless but am trying to focus on the positive.

[anne7]

We have been TTC for 2 years now and we've already discussed adoption. However, we're both graduate students wihtout any hope of making more than $40,000/year AFTER we graduate (yes, PhDs are not valued in the world we live in!). Anyway, we've discussed adoption but are concerned we can't even afford our own house let alone the adoption fees. I'm not sure a couple who lives in an apartment would pass a home study. I don't have much hope because it seems when you're infertile, your only option is to be rich (or to pretend you are). My insurance refuses to pay for infertility diagnosis and treatments - so our bills are already building. We don't believe in debt - so now we're even more limited. Anybody else out there who is on a fixed income and was able to adopt without debt???

[jnem]

Their are amazing foster/to permenant agencies. They absorb almost or all of the basic financial stuff. The spoiling them rotten part is up to you They even pay for college (state). My good friends are very active and their best friend is going to be featured on EXTREME HOME MAKE OVER! Her name is JOYA and she lives in PA...stay tuned!

Jen

[mondk]

We've been ttc #2 since 1999...after 2 miscarriages and a failed IVF cycle, we are throwing in the towel and heading to adoption.

Blessings, Michelle

[Junebug]

thank you all for all of your positive thoughts about adoption. I have been begining to research adoption on the internet and I have found the amount of information overwhelming and a bit daunting. Seemed like it was so long and involved- not to mention expensive.
I am glad to hear your success stories!

[sunny72]

We got our miracle after 3 years and 2 failed IUI's. Now for #2 we've been hoping since 2004. We just had our first ICSI resulting in a m/c. We are starting to do soul searching and thinking about international adoption.

[Doggiesmum]

Decided to take the route after latest escapade. Trying one more IVF/ICSI in September but starting the adoption process now. If we should get lucky biologically no worries, we'll continue with adoption. DH is American I'm British and we live in Cyprus (Europe). We will try US Agencies, Cypriot Authorities (International Adoption only, no children here!!!) and International Agencies.

If anyone can recommend an agency we would be grateful.




There is light at the end of the tunnel, you just have to change the batteries!!!!

[screamer]

After clomid and IUI's with no luck, now deciding adoption or IVF.
I am just trying to decide what is the best. Doing alot of research through the internet, can be overwhelming sometimes.